90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days couple Stephanie Matto and Erika Owens hadn't spoken in weeks after Stephanie returned home to the United States, so was their relationship really over for good or did they get back together after filming the show's fourth season?
|
ADVERTISEMENT
|
[90 Day Fiance Spoilers Warning: This report contains spoilers -- including an update from the Tell-All reunion that filmed in May -- which reveal if Stephanie and Erika ever reconciled, and if so, whether the 90 Day Fiance couple is still together now].
Stephanie, a 29-year-old from Yonkers, NY, and Erika, a 24 year-old from Port Augusta, Australia, are the first same-sex couple to appear on the 90 Day Fiance franchise.RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE' COUPLES NOW: WHERE ARE THEY NOW? WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? (PHOTOS)
Stephanie, who's originally from Czech Republic and moved to America when she was seven years old with her mother, revealed she's been hurt many times before by partners, but she had hope things with Erika would be different.
Stephanie and Erika, a quirky and colorful photographer, met online and began talking about a year before the 90 Day Fiance season began filming.
Stephanie had yet to come out as bisexual to her family, so she decided to travel to Australia and meet Erika in person in order to determine their relationship could truly become something serious and long-term.
"Erika doesn't deserve to be a secret," Stephanie admitted.
"But I just know for a fact my mom is not going to be thrilled I'm flying to Australia to meet a woman... I don't want anything to come between me and my mom. I just want her to accept my life the way that it is."
Erika said she hadn't met many bisexual women in her small town in "The Outback" and so she felt lucky to have come across someone like Stephanie. Erika had yet to come out to her parents as well, but she noted her parents probably already assumed she's gay.
Erika told her friends she and Stephanie had only been romantic for four months, but Stephanie was thinking about getting engaged by the end of her trip to Australia.
Stephanie, however, worried that her lifestyle was far too different from Erika, who apparently partied a lot and lived an adventurous life.
RELATED LINK: 'MARRIED AT FIRST SIGHT' COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO BROKE UP? WHERE ARE THEY NOW? (PHOTOS)
Stephanie -- a self-declared homebody who battles aplastic anemia, a complete failure of the bone marrow -- had also been celibate for a while in order to protect her heart. She wanted to wait until she was in love, and truly loved back, before having sex again.
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE' COUPLES NOWStephanie and Erika finally met in Australia, and Stephanie gushed Erika was "the most beautiful, best smelling, best dressed, most amazing human being."
Two days into her trip, tension started to build when Stephanie found herself uncomfortable on a date Erika had planned for them in which the girls took their shirts off and made colorful molds of their breasts.
"You're telling me that you want to have this next big relationship [and have me move] and whatever, and then on the other hand, you're essentially telling me you're not ready to be intimate, and that's really confusing," Erika complained to Stephanie.
The pair had another disagreement during a dinner date that night when Stephanie asked Erika to uninstall a dating app that had been on her phone.
Erika snapped about how Stephanie didn't trust her, but Stephanie didn't think it was a big deal and that deleting the app would be a sign of respect.
Stephanie cried about how Erika was showing her "true colors," but Erika complained about Stephanie's jealousy and control issues and stormed off.
And the arguing didn't stop there. Stephanie's struggle with jealousy and insecurity became increasingly more apparent when she met Erika's friends at a subsequent social gathering.
Erika had hooked up with some of her friends before, including a man named Adam, and so Stephanie put him on the spot and asked if he had lingering feelings for Erika.
ADVERTISEMENT
Erika was angry at Stephanie for bringing up their problems in front of her friends when they were supposed to be having a good time, but Stephanie argued she had every right to ask questions since she was only in Australia for a short period of time.
Erika accused Stephanie of yelling at her and being ridiculous, and then Erika vented, "I'm done!"
And at this point, Stephanie was close to giving up on her romance with Erika.
"I came here thinking Erika was the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with... Now, after all of this, I'm kind of realizing how much I still don't know about her. And I don't see how we're going to make any sort of commitment by the end of this three weeks. I'm not even sure if I want this relationship any more," Stephanie said.
After spending the night apart, Stephanie apologized and said she had never intended to cause drama and was "a screwed up person" who's not perfect.
The pair therefore started fresh, and the pair bonded over activities such as swimming with great white sharks. Erika then came out to her parents and introduced Stephanie as her girlfriend, and Erika's parents were completely supportive and encouraging.
In order to show her love and commitment in return, Stephanie planned to introduce Erika to her mom Magda as her girlfriend.
Stephanie admittedly felt "very nervous" about coming out to her "conservative" and "traditional" mother, so she ended up backing out when FaceTiming with Magda.
"I can't. I can't do it right now," Stephanie said. "It just doesn't feel right to do this through a computer screen. My mom means a lot to me. I owe her to do it in person."
RELATED LINK: 'DANCING WITH THE STARS' PROS AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS: WHO'S DATING OR MARRIED TO WHOM!? (PHOTOS)
But this bred insecurities in Erika, who apparently had an on-again, off-again relationship for 10 years with a woman who never came out to her family and essentially kept Erika a secret.
Erika therefore decided to be upfront with Stephanie about her concerns of being hidden -- but Stephanie was blown away because this was the first time she was hearing about Erika's previous 10-year romance.
ADVERTISEMENT
Erika said she felt "awful" that Stephanie yelled at her when she was just trying to be open, honest and vulnerable.
Once she calmed down, Stephanie later came back into the hotel and apologized for acting "manic," but trust was broken and Stephanie said their relationship had gone back to "square one."
"You are saying to me, 'My mom is definitely not going to be okay with this.' What do you want me to think?!... Why don't you just live with her and not bother pursuing relationships that you know she's not going to be okay with?" Erika asked Stephanie.
"Why are you playing with my heart just because you can't figure your own out?"
Stephanie said there was a level of understanding between them that would never be resolved, and then she noted, "That's it. We're done."
Stephanie said it broke her heart to call things off but she'd "always love" Erika. She didn't see any hope of them fixing the situation at the time.
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE: HAPPILY EVER AFTER?' COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? WHERE ARE THEY NOW? (PHOTOS)
In one last meeting before Stephanie left Australia, the girls solidified their romance was over.
"I just don't give a f-ck anymore. I'm sick of arguing about it and I just want to forget any of this happened," Erika complained. "But unfortunately I can't because all of my friends are asking me about it, my parents are asking me about it -- I have to talk about it."
Once Stephanie and Erika parted ways, Erika was feeling hurt and confused and so she sat down with her mother to talk about things.
"I feel like she was just playing with my feelings the whole time," Erika told her mother, before adding, "I think I'm done. I feel like it's always me giving so much of myself."
ADVERTISEMENT
When Stephanie got home to the United States, she said her trip had ended in the worst possible way and she and Erika hadn't spoken. She also said they blocked each other on social media.
"I don't regret coming here; that's the risk you take in every relationship. I took a huge risk and I learned a lot about myself, and I will always have a piece of Erika in my heart. I hope one day we can talk,'" Stephanie told the cameras.
Magda could tell something was not right when she picked her daughter up at the airport, so Stephanie hoped to open up and be vulnerable soon about being bisexual.
"If I keep bottling it up, I am going to explode," Stephanie said in a confessional.
A few weeks later, Stephanie did finally come out to her mom, saying she was lonely and sad dealing with heartbreak on her own.
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE' COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? WHERE ARE THEY KNOW? (PHOTOS)
Magda thought Stephanie was just "confused" because she had been in "toxic" relationships in the past.
"I don't think I'm confused, mom. This is not something new. This is not the first time I've ever had feelings for another woman. I am bisexual. This is me and who I am as a person," Stephanie said.
Magda had been hoping Stephanie would marry Prince Charming and have a traditional wedding in the Czech Republic, but she told Stephanie she would accept anything that makes her daughter happy.
Is Stephanie and Erika's relationship really over or has the 90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days couple reconciled?
90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days' Season 4 cast Tell-All reunion had reportedly been set to film at a studio in New York City in March similar to past seasons, but due to the coronavirus pandemic, those plans ended up being postponed.Instead, the show ended up filming a reunion remotely, with everyone participating via videoconference, during the first weekend of May.
ADVERTISEMENT
During a recent episode of The Fraudcast, Katrina revealed details about what went down on the reunion, including the latest on Erika and Stephanie's romance.
According to Katrina, Stephanie and Erika aren't even on speaking terms!
"I do have some Tell-All tea about Stephanie and Erika," Katrina said. "They are barely on speaking terms in real life and on the Tell-All!"
"It's not pretty, you guys... A lot of you guys are asking, 'Are they still together?' And not only are they NOT together but they're not even speaking to each other."
"And that sort of antagonistic fighting with each other continues through the Tell-All," Katrina added.
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE: BEFORE THE 90 DAYS' COUPLES NOW: WHERE ARE THEY NOW? WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? (PHOTOS)
Katrina later appeared on Katie Joy's "Without A Crystal Ball" YouTube channel and revealed additional information about the demise of Stephanie and Erika's partnership.
Katie acknowledged rumors are swirling that Erika already has a new girlfriend, and then Katrina dished, "I think the Stephanie that Erika got in Australia is not the Stephanie that she had been engaging with for the last nine months prior to that."
"They are pretty volatile with each other on the Tell-All," Katrina added. "And I don't know that Erika gets any actual closure or answers."
Katrina said Erika will be shown raising her concerns and issues and then Stephanie starts "crying her crocodile tears."
Katrina said Stephanie made it "all about her" at the reunion taping, which prevented Erika from "being heard and getting her point across."
ADVERTISEMENT
In the leaked footage, Stephanie and Erika are shown talking with host Shaun Robinson over video conference and admitting it was tough to envision them becoming friends.
"I think because there's so much hurt and emotion still that's, like, kind of raw and that we're dealing with, at the very best case scenario, we can be friends from afar," Stephanie explained.
"So support each other from a distance and that's it, and that's the most I can hope for."
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE: HAPPILY EVER AFTER?' COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? WHERE ARE THEY NOW? (PHOTOS)
And Erika agreed, explaining, "It's really hard to say what might come in the future because we've kind of become friends again and then fought again many, many times. I don't want any hatred and I don't want any drama."
Erika felt she wasn't able to speak her mind at the Tell-All, so she wanted fans to know the following: "I don't hold any hatred or nastiness or horribleness at all. But it's going to be really hard to see any of this in a positive light and be able to move forward and be able to be friends in most capacities."
Erika said what hurt and disappointed her the most was having to tell her parents she and Stephanie broke up after she had just introduced Stephanie to them as her girlfriend.
"It really sucked, but I understand that these things happen. It's not something I'm going to move forward with hatred about. It's just been really, really hard," Erika told Shaun.
"If I would've known the next day things would spiral the way that they did and we'd break up, I would've never gone to her parents' home, but they were lovely people. And seeing her come out to her parents was a pretty incredible moment," Stephanie said.
Stephanie explained Erika's experience inspired her to come out to her mother, which turned out to be a "complicated" situation and not so easy for her.
However, both girls insisted they didn't regret coming out to their parents, and Stephanie wished she had been honest with her mother from the get-go about why she was traveling to Australia.
ADVERTISEMENT
More insight into Stephanie's character and her intentions with Erika
Katie noted on her YouTube channel Stephanie, on the surface, seems like a good person and maybe she and Erika just weren't a good match."My own personal opinion is that I think Stephanie doesn't know how to be real Stephanie," Katrina said, adding that Stephanie is much more conservative offline.
"She is so her online persona, and I don't fault her at all [for that]. But I don't know if Stephanie knows who she is outside of her online persona."
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE: BEFORE THE 90 DAYS' COUPLES NOW: WHERE ARE THEY NOW? WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? (PHOTOS)
After the 90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days episode aired in which Stephanie dumped Erika during her final days in Australia, Stephanie received a lot of hate and backlash.
"People leaving hate know NOTHING, and never will. I assure you the whole situation was so much more complex than you realize. I went with my gut instinct," Stephanie wrote on her Instagram Stories shortly after the episode aired.
"I reacted TERRIBLY, but I was under a ton of pressure. It was literally a pressure cooker of emotions. Again, I am seeking help for the way I handle things," Stephanie continued.
"Stop trying to diagnose me. There are actual doctors who can do that. You watched a highly edited clip on a reality TV show. You don't have a PhD. Again, you know NOTHING about the actual situation, and in the end, my gut led me in the right direction."
The Instagram and YouTube personality concluded, "I understand you have your ideas of who I am, but I don't think it is necessary for you to voice that on my page. Thanks for watching tonight, hopefully people can watch, judge, and respectfully carry on. I apologized to Erika, my mother, and everyone involved."
Meanwhile, Erika also took to Instagram and posted a statement of her own.
"I've been searching for ways to heal myself, and I've found that kindness is the best way," Erika wrote on Instagram Stories, citing a Lady Gaga quote.
"Remember tonight and every night, that no matter what, it's so important to be kind. Remember we are all people. We are all human and all have emotions. I thank you all so much for the love and support from the bottom of my heart but that doesn't need to be validated with hatefulness towards anyone. Love and light always. X."
ADVERTISEMENT
And in mid-May, Stephanie took to her Instagram Stories to blast critics claiming she had signed up to do the show for fame, money, and to boost her career as a social media influencer.
Stephanie denied all the above and also expressed how it's ridiculous for some people to think she pretended to be bisexual just to star on 90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days.
In addition, Stephanie explained why she waited so long to come out to her mother.
Want more 90 Day Fiance spoilers or couples updates? Click here to visit our 90 Day Fiance homepage!
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
