90 Day Fiance star Ashley Martson has made plans to leave the country to avoid reliving and dealing with the aftermath of the emotional and dramatic scenes that will air on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After? on TLC on Sunday night.
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Ashley discussed her tumultuous relationship with estranged husband Jay Smith during a pair of Instagram Live sessions with Instagrammer John Yates last weekend and teased TLC's broadcast of the next episode of 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After? is going to be too much for her to handle.
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"No, not going to watch it, don't want to watch it, not gonna rewind and watch it," Ashley told John.
While Ashley acknowledged she has made prior comments trying to blame TLC for dramatizing footage on 90 Day Fiance and its spinoffs, she admitted that's not the case this time.
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"I have no ambition to watch any of it because I'm not even -- listen, I have made comments about TLC and some things being, you know, a little dramatized. But what's about to happen is as raw and as real as it possibly comes and it's something I never want to relive again," Ashley said.
Ashley therefore made plans to leave for a week-long cruise with her mother and children this weekend to get away from it all.
"Like, honestly, I am turning all comments off Instagram, I don't want to deal with any of it. I'm gonna be on a cruise, so I'm probably not gonna have signal anyway and yeah, I don't want to relive it, I don't want to deal with it, and I will not watch it," Ashley insisted.
"But yeah, I hope everyone enjoys the show, but please know that was one of the worst times in my life so I don't want to watch it, I don't want to see what people have to say about it. So I'm shutting all my sh-t down."
Ashley went on to apologize to her fans considering they won't be able to interact with her during that time.
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"But I am already still going through it as I said earlier and I don't want, I don't want to deal with it. So I'm going away where I won't have signal, unless I like go to the Wi-Fi spot," Ashley said.
"I'm a little concerned about what's going to be said, because when I find out some news I don't have a good response."
In a preview for the upcoming Sunday night episode of 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After?, Ashley is shown yelling at Jay through FaceTime.
"You're done! If you show up at my house, the police will be waiting to deport your ass," Ashley yelled. "He was using me. And he f-cking got away with it for a long time."
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Ashley then broke down crying in the preview.
"I think the hardest thing for me is the back and forth. Because you know, it's a show, it's dramatic, it's funny. Like I get a kick out of watching the other couples argue and stuff, but when you're living through it it's a different situation," Ashley told John.
Ashley said she hopes something better will come down the road.
"I loved him and people can say, 'Oh, you guys are staging it for the show,' whatever -- but I wasn't staging it for the show, I loved him, and I got hurt really bad, and it still hurts," Ashley explained.
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Ashley filed for divorce from Jay for the second time in April, citing "adultery" on Jay's part as the reason for their split. Rumors have been circulating for months Jay had cheated, and at one point, there were also rumors Jay had gotten another woman pregnant.
After Ashley's first Instagram Live session with John, Jay had a chance to speak his mind and respond to Ashley's comments, and the way he talked about women wasn't pretty.
"To hear him on your Live saying, 'Oh, she called the cops on me,' and 'I had a bitch cooking me breakfast in her bra and underwear' -- like that's the person I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with. You know?" Ashley told John afterwards.
"Or to say, 'Oh Johnny, I have ten bitches in my house right now' -- that hurts. I would never want to hurt someone the way he has."
According to Ashley, Jay moved out of their shared Pennsylvania home while Ashley was visiting Texas a couple of months ago.
"I paid [for his place]," she said. "We were not getting along -- he was sleeping with multiple women -- so I actually, we got the money for [filming] the Tell-All. [Unlike filming Happily Ever After?'s regular season,] when we film the Tell-All, we get paid that day."
"So I actually offered to pay two months of his rent to get him out of my house because he wouldn't leave my house. Yeah, that's how he's there in his own apartment."
Ashley also confirmed she did, in fact, file for Jay's adjustment of status at one point, but she pulled it two weeks later after he "screwed up again."
Ashley therefore claimed Jay is currently living and working in the United States illegally and has a deportation hearing pending.
"[He] started f-ck-ng everything with a vagina" as soon as he arrived in America, Ashley alleged.
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In addition, Ashley told John that Jay has been asking her to retract her divorce filing and re-file his adjustment of status papers so that he won't be deported back to Jamaica.
"Honestly, I got messages from him two days ago that said that he wanted to go to sex addiction counseling, he wanted to go to marriage counseling, he wanted to work it out," Ashley claimed.
"I think the only reason he was keeping in touch with me for the past month is because he doesn't get paid for being on 90 Day Fiance... so technically I should be splitting the check [I'm getting after the finale airs] with him, but that is absolutely not gonna happen."
Ashley added, "Like the money that I've spent on him in the last three years is like 20 times the amount of the check that we're about to get for the show. So I will not be sharing the check with him and I will not be withdrawing the divorce and re-filing the paperwork like he's asking."
Ashley, however, put some of the responsibility and blame on herself for the failure of her marriage.
"I'm not even gonna stay here and play victim, I made mistakes in our relationship. I said that I could forgive and forget after the Tinder incident. You know, I was ashamed," Ashley said, referring to how Jay had been caught flirting with women on Tinder several days after their Las Vegas wedding.
After the dating-app scandal in December 2018, Ashley filed for divorce for the first time on January 11, but she ultimately withdrew the paperwork just 11 days later on January 22.
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"I even tried to blame TLC and say, 'Oh yeah, they dramatize shit,' because I was embarrassed to say that I went back with someone that was on Tinder three days after I got married. Because I was an idiot," Ashley admitted to John.
"And what you guys are about to see next week, I watched the previews, and like -- just putting myself back in that day is like I'm so glad that I'm going to be away and that I won't have [mobile phone] signal. Because I don't want to see what people have to say [online]. Like I know I'm stupid."
Ashley confessed that because she loved Jay, she "ignored all the signs."
"And then I tried to forgive someone and I couldn't forgive and I was not nice. I was controlling, I didn't trust him, and it made for both of us to have miserable lives that ultimately ended up with him cheating on me multiple times again," Ashley insisted.
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Ashley and Jay -- who officially got married on May 16, 2018, months before their Las Vegas ceremony -- starred on Season 6 of 90 Day Fiance before appearing on the currently-airing fourth season of 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After? on TLC.
RELATED LINK: '90 DAY FIANCE' COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER? WHO HAS SPLIT? WHERE ARE THEY NOW? (PHOTOS)
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