The Golden Bachelorette star Joan Vassos has elaborated on her surprising decision to take intimacy off the table during her Fantasy Suite dates.
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"I'm not a person who can have a physical relationship with more than one person," Joan, 61, told Us Weekly.
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Joan therefore said she focused on "emotional intimacy" rather than the physical side of a relationship during her overnight dates.
"I wanted it to be agreed that we would talk and have the conversations we need to have off-camera. We didn't spend the night together. There was no bed in the room," Joan shared.
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And Joan insisted that the men still in the running for her heart at that point were pleased with her decision.
"You've got to think, the person you're potentially ending up with probably does not want to think of you, last week, having slept with the guy he hangs out with," Joan explained. "It's just weird."
Joan's approach to Fantasy Suites was completely different from how the franchise's leading men and women had behaved before her.
Even Gerry Turner appeared to have intimate Fantasy Suite dates with Theresa Nist and Leslie Fhima on The Golden Bachelor last year.
"Everybody needs to do it their way. I'm not judging," Joan shared.
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"The physical part is important at every age, but I think it's more important when people are younger. Each of us needs to engineer the journey so it works best for us."
Not only did Joan's bachelors apparently respect her decision to refrain from having sex, but her four kids -- Nick, 34; Erica, 33; Allison, 30; and Luke, 28 -- did also.
"The kids didn't want too much smooching or Fantasy Suites," Joan recalled of what her children had told her before filming.
The grandmother of three revealed on The View in September that she'd "never have a physical relationship with more than one" man at any given time.
"That's just not something I would do," Joan explained.
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Joan therefore decided to switch up the usual The Bachelor and The Bachelorette process for the overnight dates.
"I said right away that I wanted to do Fantasy Suites because there is a lot of value in being able to talk to somebody without cameras," Joan recalled.
"So I said, 'I want to do Fantasy Suites, but I don't want to have a bed in there. I'm taking that off the table.'"
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Joan, who had been married for 32 years before her late husband John Vassos died, clarified how her Fantasy Suite dates were "about emotional intimacy" and her bachelors "thought it was a good idea."
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During a subsequent appearance on The Bachelorette alum Jason Tartick's "Trading Secrets" podcast, Joan shared more about what happened behind closed doors during her Fantasy Suite dates.
"You can't have stupid conversations... You need to have important conversations," Joan told Jason.
"Every conversation has to be important because you don't have many opportunities. So, you have to say things, like, 'You don't have to come live with me, and I don't have to come live with you either.'"
Joan explained how she discussed finances off-camera during her overnight The Golden Bachelorette dates because she wants to end up with a man who is financially stable.
"My husband and I worked really, really hard to create a really nice life, and we did," Joan said of John, who passed away in 2021 from pancreatic cancer.
"It required a lot of work and a lot of hours and a lot of time away from the family. John spent a lot of time -- many, many hours at work -- and we ended up being really financially secure."
Joan therefore admitted, "I wanted somebody who is in the same place as me."
"Let's face it: doing cool things in life often isn't free. It often costs money, and so I wanted a partner that had the same resources I have," Joan said.
"So, you know, those conversations -- I could either just kind of tell, based on their professions and things like that, and also, when you get behind closed doors and you get to the Fantasy Suites, you do talk about that. Those are important conversations."
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Joan admitted talking about money, credit and resources "sounds so not lovey," but this is "real life" and she treated her experience on The Golden Bachelorette that way.
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"You talk about love and you talk about feelings and about all those things, but you also need to talk practical!" Joan said. "And that was a big conversation I did have with people."
As for whether Joan found true love for the second time in her life on The Golden Bachelorette, the blonde beauty teased of her season's ending: "I left the show exactly where I think I need to be."
Joan concluded that "life has a way of unfolding the way it's supposed to" and she believes that her journey on The Golden Bachelorette "really did."
Joan decided to quit The Golden Bachelor during Week 3 of the process last year to tend to her postpartum daughter at home, and ABC later selected her to star on The Golden Bachelorette, which premiered September 18 on ABC.
According to a preview of what's going to unfold on The Golden Bachelorette's upcoming Wednesday, October 16 broadcast, Joan will choose her Final 4 bachelors for hometown dates.
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