Lindsay Lohan has revealed she suffered a miscarriage while her Lindsay docu-reality series was filming, which is why she had refused to film the show for a couple weeks.
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"I cried so many times watching it," Lohan told a producer of the series during an interview that aired during Sunday night's Lindsay finale broadcast on Oprah Winfrey's OWN network.
"Because I don't see it as me, it's strange. I can't watch myself, it's weird. Yeah, of course I'm a bit of a narcissist. Who isn't in this industry? At the same time, it's still like, when a camera is on, I'm on. If I know I'm not capable of being on, that's why I would say I couldn't film today. No one knows this, and we can finish [the interview] after this -- I had a miscarriage for those two weeks that I took off."
Lohan, 27, teared up during the conversation and revealed some additional details about her loss.
"It's a very long story, but that's why on the show when it says, 'She doesn't want to come down, she doesn't want to come down,' I couldn't move. I was sick. And mentally that messes with you," the Lindsay star explained.
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Lohan declined to disclose who the father was or how far along she was in the pregnancy prior to having the miscarriage.
"Watching this series, I just know how I felt at that moment and I can relate to that girl, which sounds kind of crazy," Lohan continued. "But I'm like, 'Oh my God, this is really sad. Who's helping her?' And no one knows what's going on in my head at every second because I'm constantly thinking. My mind does not shut off."
The troubled reality TV star and actress added that meditation or music usually helps her calm her mind.
"There's a lot going on in my life then. Here's the thing, it's like, even if it's not my intention to lose everything I'm not working for, that's what this addiction [of alcohol] will do to me," she told the producer.
Lohan recently confirmed a 36-name list of her sexual partners that had previously leaked to the media.
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"That was actually my fifth step in [Alcoholics Anonymous] at [the] Betty Ford [Clinic]," Lohan said during a recent appearance on Watch What Happens Live. "And someone, when I was moving during the OWN show, must've taken a photo of it. So that's a really personal thing and it's really unfortunate. It was the last episode of my new show."
Reports of the sex list began circulating in early March when Lindsay, which premiered on March 9, was still filming. The list included major stars such as Justin Timberlake, Colin Farrell, Zac Efron, Adam Levine, James Franco, and Heath Ledger.
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski