Married at First Sight expert Pastor Calvin Roberson believes Erik Lake's ultimatums to his wife Virginia Coombs are ridiculous.
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"A big difference we still have is the kids thing. A big thing I still need to know is, you know, he says if we don't have kids, he's done," Virginia, who admitted she was 50/50 on the idea of starting a family, laments in the clip.
"I've literally expressed to him that I have a fear of one, being pregnant, and of two, being a bad mom."
Unfiltered host Jamie Otis -- who starred on Season 1 of Married at First Sight -- asked Pastor Cal, "What do you think of Erik telling Virginia he's 'done' if she doesn't want kids?"
"It's ridiculous," Pastor Cal replied.
Pastor Cal made the ladies crack up with laughter, and then he continued, "In short, it's ridiculous. I think Erik needs to have more understanding and less ultimatums."
Pastor Cal elaborated, "It's one thing to express the importance of wanting a thing, but you cannot always threaten your marriage with divorce."
Jamie asked Clara what she would do if her husband, Ryan Oubre, placed that ultimatum on her about having children.
"Not to pick a side at all, bit that's huge in a marriage. That's a dealbreaker type of thing," Clara shared.
"I don't think either one of them is necessarily wrong; I think Virginia absolutely has a right to not want kids tomorrow."
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Jamie responded, "I couldn't have said it better myself."
Clara also admitted she has similar fears about welcoming a child someday, acknowledging that Virginia's concerns were not unusual.
"I think that's very natural," Clara noted.
"Yeah," agreed Haley, who married Jacob Harder on the show.
"I think especially in this day and age when you're so judged based on your figure and your looks, I think it's really scary to be like, 'Okay, well, I know that I'm not going to look the same way,'" Clara shared.
She added, "Yeah, if you're not afraid of being a bad mom, I'd be a little more concerned."
Haley nodded her head in agreeance and said, "Exactly."
Haley also expressed her belief that Virginia would probably make a great mother.
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From the beginning of their marriage, Virginia found Erik's strong opinions or beliefs on certain subjects a little off-putting. She has complained about Erik being too controlling at times.
Erik made Virginia aware he wasn't thrilled with the idea of her interacting with guy friends on social media or sleeping at their houses after nights of partying, and he also sternly insisted Virginia's dog Rocky needed better manners and more training.
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In addition, Erik told Virginia that she essentially needed to move into his apartment once the show is over for their marriage to work when Virginia didn't feel comfortable staying at his place with her pets.
Married at First Sight expert Dr. Viviana Coles said during a March episode of Unfiltered that Erik's issue is that he tends to state or explain things in a commanding way and so it comes across demanding.
Viviana told Erik, "It sounds like you know what you don't want and you want to give her that feedback; you want to give her the keys to make sure that you're happy. But she doesn't know that that's where it's coming from."
Viviana pointed out to the pilot, "It just sounds like demand, demand, demand."
Erik said he had standards he wanted to live by as well as expectations for what a marriage should look like given he had been married and divorced once before, but Virginia seemed to think Erik was lecturing or pressuring her to behave a certain way.
Virginia suggested to Erik on the latest MAFS Season 12 episode that he often got "stuck in the constraints" of what he thought marriage was supposed to be.
"There are things you just don't do," Erik told Virginia. "What do you want from me? I'm just being honest about that."
"Okay, but I feel like there's a long list of those [standards] that you're never going to compromise with me on," Virginia argued.
Erik said he didn't have "a long list" of marriage standards and he wasn't willing to let those go.
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
