'Married at First Sight' recap: Erik and Virginia's marriage "combusts," Chris asks Paige for a divorce again, and Clara admits to pleasuring Ryan nightly

Married at First Sight featured Erik Lake and Virginia Coombs' marriage "combusting," Paige Banks working on self-love after Chris Williams asked for a divorce again, Clara Berghaus revealing she was pleasuring Ryan Oubre nightly and getting nothing in return, and Haley Harris and Jacob Harder making progress during the Season 12 episode that aired Wednesday night on Lifetime.


At this point in Season 12, the five Married at First Sight couples just passed their one-month anniversary: Haley and Jacob, Clara and Ryan, Paige and Chris, Erik and Virginia, and Vincent Morales and Briana Myles.

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Paige and Chris, however, were not living together and Chris just mentioned they weren't connecting and should probably part ways.

The five couples were matched for matrimony by the show's experts Pastor Calvin Roberson, Dr. Pepper Schwartz, and Dr. Viviana Coles.

Married at First Sight  Season 12 Episode 12

The Married at First Sight broadcast began on Day 32 of marriage, with the couples having reached the one-month mark of their marriages and trying to merge their lives and adapt to each other's living preferences.

The couples had less than four weeks to decide whether they'd like to stay married or get divorced.

Vincent and Briana woke up in bed together and Vincent playfully asked his wife when she was going to plan a date for him.

Vincent looked forward to many trips with Briana and said he'd like to go to the zoo, a sporting event, a cigar bar, the botanical gardens, the aquarium and more. Vincent also wanted to zipline and participate in some adventurous activities.

Briana realized she had her work cut out for her since she had been thinking more along the lines of dinner and a movie.


Meanwhile, Erik and Virginia celebrated a successful one-month anniversary after Erik took Virginia flying, but Erik got annoyed when Virginia's dog Rocky suddenly jumped on the bed and stole Virginia's attention away from him.

Erik said he liked how he and Virginia both treated their dogs in a similar way, but Erik bragged about how his dog Tex was better trained and had better manners. Erik suggested he'd like to be firm with Rocky and use his military training to put an end to Rocky's bad habits.

"He's biting people. I hate that. He's not where I would want to be in a dog," Erik said.

"Well he's not your dog," Virginia replied.

"He's half mine now whether you like it or not, unless you want to end this right now," Erik noted. "I feel like he comes between us and our relationship."


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Virginia said she was "over" and "done" with that conversation and bringing up Rocky was going to cause a fight. Erik didn't want this to affect his relationship, but Virginia left the apartment and cried outside about how she was depressed when she got Rocky and he "saved" her.

Virginia revealed this conversation came at a terrible time because she and Erik had also gotten into a huge fight at the bar the previous night.

"Honestly, at this exact moment, I want to f-cking fun. Everything is like -- I'm just so f-cking over all of it. I truly am," Virginia cried to a producer outside.

With 24 days to go until "Decision Day," Clara and Ryan took a tantric yoga class together in attempt to connect in a new way and build physical chemistry.


Since talking about their sex life "wasn't really helping things," according to Clara -- who was admittedly sexually frustrated -- she hoped a little physical touch would get them over "the last hurdle."

The class, however, did not help the couple's physical connection for Ryan, and Clara could tell progress had not been made sexually.

"I can't be married to a man who won't have sex with me indefinitely," Clara confessed. "And it is frustrating that I'm the only one trying."

After Virginia took Rocky on an off-leash walk, which she was trying to rub in Erik's face since he had suggested Rocky would run away outdoors and Tex wouldn't, Virginia acknowledged they weren't in a good place.

Erik apparently fought with Virginia the night prior about her "vanishing" in the bar for "like 40 minutes," but Virginia snapped that she didn't want to fight with her husband every time she wanted to go out with her friends.


Virginia told Erik that she was just in the bathroom and then at the bar and noted his so-called "protective" nature was coming across as "controlling." Erik insisted he just wanted to take care of Virginia at all times as her husband.

But Virginia challenged Erik and said he seemed to get mad at her every time they drink together.

"You can think whatever the f-ck you want. I don't care. But for me, I'll leave you alone. It's fine," Erik said.

Virginia accused Erik of not even being open to a conversation, and Erik said he was over the fight and had been done with it for hours. Erik reminded Virginia that she's "f-cking married."

"If you don't like it, then get out of it," Erik snapped of their marriage.

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Erik asked Virginia what she wanted from him and how long she was going to stay mad, and then Virginia broke down into tears and lost her composure.

Erik told the cameras that he wasn't going to put up with any "b-llsh-t" and Virginia tended to get "so defensive" and put walls up that he couldn't break, which really hurt him and he didn't deserve at all.

Erik vented to Virginia, "I always get hurt. This is my life."

And then Virginia flipped out, saying, "I have anxiety and I feel like I'm drowning right now! I feel like I just want to get the f-ck out of here! That's how I feel and I'm sorry about that, but then you turn it back on you and say, 'Oh, I always get hurt, poor me!'"

Erik attempted to comfort Virginia since she was clearly suffering from severe anxiety, and Erik asked what was wrong because she was "scaring" him and needed to talk.

"What is so bad?" Erik asked. "It's fine."


Virginia said she wanted to leave their apartment and go home or visit her sister.

"I feel like I'm an awful dog mom and I have so many issues right now that I didn't even notice before," Virginia lamented. "I hardly see my cats. I just feel like I'm failing at all my relationships. I never talk to anyone I normally do."

Erik asked Virginia if she felt like he was taking those things away from her, and Virginia replied, "I feel like my whole life is different."

Erik insisted that he didn't want to change who Virginia is, but she disagreed.

"I feel like I'm the only one making changes and making sacrifices and doing sh-t different," Virginia said.

Erik said everyone must change in a marriage because it's all about compromise, and then Virginia snapped at her husband, "Right, you're perfect. You do everything perfect."


"I'm not perfect. I'm not. But if you don't like it..." Erik began.

"I swear to God if you say I can 'leave,' I'm going to punch you in the face," Virginia shouted.

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Erik told Virginia that she wasn't stuck in their marriage and was free to do whatever she'd like with her life.

Meanwhile, Haley was thinking she and Jacob were headed for a divorce on "Decision Day" after a big fight on their one-month anniversary at a winery. Jacob apparently apologized for lashing out and wished Haley could understand where he was coming from.

Jacob told the cameras he just wanted a "normal" relationship with his wife, and he assured Haley that he didn't plan on fighting with her again any time soon. Haley asked Jacob to just have a little fun with her and allow her to be relaxed.


Jacob suggested he and Haley should reset 100 percent and attempt to have a nice hour-long conversation once a week, and Haley agreed. Haley said she wanted the best for Jacob and he seemed to want the same for her.

Haley hoped open communication could build trust between them going forward.

As for Paige, she invited her brother Andre and his wife Christina over her apartment. Paige said her faith had been tested in her marriage to Chris and she was seeking peace at this point.

Paige revealed Chris had told her that he was "going through a reconciliation process" with his pregnant ex-fiancee Mercedes Myrick and wanted a divorce "just like that."

"There was no consideration for the other person that you're legally bound to," Paige said. "I just feel like I've never seen a level of rejection like this and then constantly being toyed with my emotions and then play [the game]."

Paige suggested Chris was being manipulative in telling her that he felt rejected because she hadn't answered some of his phone calls. Paige recalled Chris saying that their marriage had simply failed.


"Do you not see the seeds that you have sewn?" Paige questioned.

Paige said Chris never dropped her a note saying he was thinking about her or sending her a text, wishing her a great day during a difficult time. Paige accused Chris of never even giving her "the bare minimum" in their relationship to try to figure out their marriage.

"I literally feel like my time has been wasted. I feel devalued as a woman," Paige admitted, adding, "Maybe I've fallen in love with the idea of marriage so much that I lost myself in this process."

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Andrew congratulated Paige on trying and doing her best, reminding her that the divorce is not her fault.

Paige said she had lost herself completely in the process, but Andre told Paige to embrace the struggle because God has an ultimate plan for her -- and this may have been a part of it.


"My goal is to regain my sense of purpose and really find out what loving myself looks like," Paige noted.

"Even in relationships and marriages, you have to honor yourself, because if you won't, no one else will. And that was evident in my marriage. I was a woman that came in there whole and he tried to leave me broken -- but that didn't happen. My cup may be a little empty, but I'll be fine."

Andre told Paige that she was going to continue to rise and elevate and she had her whole life ahead of her. Paige took away the lesson that she must choose herself.

Meanwhile, Clara was preparing to leave Atlanta for three days since she's a flight attendant, and Ryan had a plan to take her dog Miska to a trainer so he could learn to communicate with her properly and build a bond.

"It's kind of funny that he wants to navigate Miska but he just doesn't want to navigate me. Yeah. So hopefully this will help THAT," Clara complained in a confessional.

Ryan told the cameras that Clara only seemed focused on one thing and he was looking to get to know her on a deeper level because he wanted their marriage to last forever.


With 23 days until "Decision Day," Married at First Sight aired cute clips of the new dog dads trying to bond with their new furbabies since all the women brought dogs into their marriages.

Vincent gushed about loving the sweet "Cookie," and Jacob was trying to handle four dogs in one apartment -- including Haley's cute pup Sophie and his own dog Chloe, who tried to fight every other dog in her presence.

Ryan was shown bringing Clara's dog Miska to a trainer, and he joked that Clara and Miska are similar because they're both lively, spunky, full of life and seek attention.

And Erik brought Rocky to a pet store and bought him some new toys. As for Chris and Paige's dog Bentley, Chris was shown telling the cameras, "I don't give a f-ck about Bentley."

Jacob and Haley then raced indoor go-karts as a fun activity and Haley ended up winning the race.

The pair had a good time and Jacob recommended they could try batting cages next.


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On Day 33 of marriage, Chris invited his mother Cindy over his place for dinner and a nice chat. Chris said his mother always gives good advice but he was hoping Cindy would "have filters on" that evening.

Chris dropped a bomb on Cindy that he and Paige weren't talking. Cindy believed Paige is a sweet girl, but Chris said Paige never reached out or talked to him unless they were on camera.

"Rightfully, so," Cindy said. "The woman you were previously engaged to is expecting your child."

"Yeah, I wish I had known that before this process because then I never would have gotten married," Chris confessed.

Cindy said there was still time to fix his marriage, but then Chris confirmed his marriage was over and "that book was closed, kid or no kid." Chris revealed he had asked Paige for a divorce and didn't want to be with her anymore.


Cindy was shocked and asked, "Are you serious?!"

"Yeah, so we're done," Chris replied.

"Wow," Cindy sighed.

Chris said he couldn't play house and pretend that things were good when they really weren't. Chris explained that he didn't want to be sad about having a baby because that's a good thing at the end of the day.

After Vincent and Briana were shown working out together by enjoying a nice competitive bike ride through the city that ended with Briana doing five pushups and Vincent doing the dishes for a week, Erik and Virginia sat down for another chat.

Erik told Virginia that he was still figuring her out a little bit and their arguments seemed to come out of nowhere. Erik said he never expected Virginia to flip out like she did and he was seeing little things change in her.


Virginia apologized for acting out, admitting she is sometimes anxiety-driven but really wanted her marriage to work. Virginia acknowledged the process had been hard for her, and Erik agreed Married at First Sight was stressful and a lot to take in.

Erik asked Virginia to come to him about absolutely anything because he'd never judge her. Virginia was glad that Erik wanted her to need him and depend on him, but she didn't want her husband to always be in control of their relationship.

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Erik and Virginia then rolled back into the same argument about Rocky, and Virginia lashed out about Erik acting like his dog Tex was God's gift to dogs. Erik recommended doing some training for Rocky, and Virginia started to cry again.

Erik said he wanted to feel like a father figure for Rocky and work with him a little bit. Erik didn't understand why Virginia needed to be so defensive and upset every time they talked about this.

Erik wanted to train Rocky together to build trust and build them closer, but Virginia shut down.


"Do you know how difficult this is for me right now, to try to talk to you?" Erik asked.

"Do you know how difficult everything is for me right now?" Virginia questioned in reply.

"If you want to be on your own, that's fine. I'm okay with that," Erik snapped.

Virginia complained in a confessional about how Erik didn't listen to her all the time and she didn't appreciate how he talked to Rocky when he's angry. Virginia had apparently asked Erik not to bring this up again, but he chose to anyway.

"I know he would never treat Tex that way, so it's always going to be a struggle until we get into a better place with it," Virginia said.

"It's not like he's a professional trainer. He trained his one day. It always f-cking goes back to Rocky -- like, why?!"


Erik concluded, "Yeah, there are definitely some days when I don't think it's going to work."

Cameras later caught Erik yelling at Virginia. He said his wife had been "a complete assh-le" to him, but Virginia said Erik always blamed everything on her.

With 22 days until "Decision Day," the Married at First Sight brides gathered together for a chat.

Paige revealed Chris could have been her "perfect match" had some things not played out the way they did. Virginia said she could breathe "a sigh of relief" hearing that Paige was finally done with Chris.

Paige said she and Chris could have tried to build a friendship earlier on but she gained a lot of wisdom through the process to carry on to her next relationship. And then Briana gushed about how Vincent was "more than [she] could have asked for" and he's exactly who she needed and asked the experts for.

Paige was so thrilled to hear that her girl Briana was happy, which she said was a testament to Married at First Sight working.


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Virginia and Briana then predicted Paige would find a wonderful man in the next six months to a year.

Virginia also determined she should see a counselor or therapist to help her with her anxiety because Erik didn't really understand the mental health side of things. Briana and Paige gave Virginia support to talk to a professional, with Paige announcing she has two therapists.

Later on, Jacob opened up to Haley about his past weird dating experiences, including a lady with pet pumpkins. Jacob said most of his past relationships didn't have drama and ended cordially.

With 21 days to go until "Decision Day," Jacob and Haley went on a double date with Vincent and Briana to a pumpkin patch.

Haley vented to Briana about how she always seemed to interview Jacob and ask him questions but then Jacob would allegedly shut down or change the subject whenever she tried to talk about herself. Haley said Jacob simply didn't engage her and she didn't know why.


Jacob revealed he went out with Haley's friends one night and they stayed out partying until 4AM and it was really fun, so they at least had some happy moments.

Briana was optimistic Haley and Jacob's relationship could work out as long as they'd continue to communicate with each other and be open.

Meanwhile, Erik said he never wanted to get divorced again but if Virginia really wanted him and their relationship, she'd "have to step up."

Virginia gently asked Erik to work on his delivery and tell her when something was wrong or bothering him. She told her husband that he didn't always need to be strong and in control because letting things build up might result in "combustion."

With that being said, Virginia noted she and Erik already had moments of "combustion," but she intended to use her husband as a crutch and rely on him more emotionally going forward.

With 20 days to go until "Decision Day," the Married at First Sight grooms got together and discussed all of the issues they were having. Erik explained how he didn't like Virginia separating yours vs. mine instead of viewing things as "ours."


Ryan bragged in a confessional about how he had been an incredible husband and thought his marriage to Clara was going better than 99 percent of Married at First Sight relationships. But Clara was still waiting for Ryan to "get there" in the sex department as he was working on building and earning trust.

However, the broadcast ended with Clara complaining to her friends about the lack of intimacy in her marriage.

Clara said she just wanted to enjoy sex with her husband and he was waiting for an emotional connection -- despite never having told a woman that he loved her.

"Genuinely, if we're doing everything else, what is the difference?" Clara lamented. "I don't get it! I don't understand it! We're doing sex things. I'm getting you off every f-cking night."

Haley asked, "And you're getting nothing?"

"Right!" Clara replied. "I mean, he's built it up in his head to be this fairy tale, rose petals. And to me, it's still just sex!"


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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski