'Married at First Sight' recap: Haley breaks down over imminent divorce from Jacob, Chris and Paige break up again, and Clara feels rejected by Ryan

Married at First Sight featured Haley Harris breaking down over divorce seeming imminent with Jacob Harder, Chris Williams telling Paige Banks they had reached a dead end in their relationship and the pair breaking up, Clara Berghaus feeling rejected, and Virginia Coombs and Erik Lake arguing over where to live during the Season 12 episode that aired Wednesday night on Lifetime.


At this point in Season 12, the five Married at First Sight couples reached their one-month anniversary: Haley and Jacob, Clara Berghaus and Ryan Oubre, Vincent Morales and Briana Myles, Paige and Chris, and Erik and Virginia.

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Paige and Chris, however, were not living together and were just working on a friendship and hopefully building a romantic connection. 

The five couples were matched for matrimony by the show's experts Pastor Calvin Roberson, Dr. Pepper Schwartz, and Dr. Viviana Coles.

Married at First Sight  Season 12 Episode 11

The Married at First Sight broadcast began on Day 29 of marriage at Ryan's home, with Clara slowly moving her belongings into his home and envisioning decorating ideas, such as stringing lights around the outside patio.

Clara politely asked Ryan to make more room for her things and her dog Miska, and Ryan realized he had a lot of work ahead of him. Clara looked forward to sharing a space with Ryan -- organizing and alphabetizing -- and buying a new bedroom set.

Ryan said he was "excited" to welcome Clara into his home but also felt a bit "overwhelmed."

Meanwhile, Paige was still a little annoyed about Chris buying his pregnant ex-fiancee Mercedes a brand new luxury car, but she met up with Chris to play basketball and remained committed to him and the process.

Paige hoped their relationship could improve, and Chris also said he wasn't ready to give up on his marriage.


When the pair talked about their future goals, Chris said he'd like to have between three and five businesses that each make $1 million as well as children and a happily-married life.

Paige then brought up how Chris had been engaged twice before and asked for the story about the first woman. Chris said he was 20 years old when he first proposed marriage and rushed into it and so he wasn't ready and didn't have the maturity to be a husband.

Chris said the pair mutually split and then got back together, and then the woman allegedly left him once and for all because he wasn't "financially stable" at the time.

Paige wished she and Chris had more deep conversations upfront, but she thanked Chris -- who still felt like a stranger to her -- for showing up and spending time with her. But Paige said they'd both need to step out of their comfort zones in order to progress their relationship.

"This is what I was looking forward to. I knew there was a reason why we were matched together. This is why I got Married at First Sight. Maybe this is what we need," Paige said.


On Day 30 of marriage, Erik and Virginia met up with Clara and Ryan for lunch. Erik bragged his marriage was "going awesome," and Ryan and Clara agreed they definitely felt married.

Virginia revealed that she and Erik had told each other "I love you," and Clara seemed a bit jealous given she falls in love easily but Ryan had never told a woman that he loved her before.

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Ryan's longest relationship was just shy of two years, and so Clara was shocked he never felt or expressed love before. Clara also appears to need words of affirmation in a relationship and wanted to be in love so badly.

"At six months, if you haven't said that at six months, I'm like, 'What's wrong? Something is clearly wrong.' If you haven't dropped that by six months, I am probably leaving," Clara told Ryan, later announcing to the group, "I have friendship companion love for him, for sure."


Ryan told Virginia and Erik that he was working towards being in love with Clara, but that didn't seem to be satisfying or enough for her.

Meanwhile, Paige, Haley and Briana met up for lunch at a restaurant. Briana gushed about how she was "all in" with her marriage but tended to be hesitant at the same time in fear of being hurt or Vincent leaving on "Decision Day."

Haley shared how she and Jacob were finally sleeping in the same bed and things were "positive" between them and they were communicating and getting to know each other. Haley explained, however, that she didn't understand Jacob's sense of humor and when he was joking.

Haley and Briana were taken aback once they learned Chris had bought his ex-fiancee a brand new car. The girls discussed how Chris should have talked to Paige about the decision first "out of respect," not even just because of the couple's finances.

Paige admitted it was "unsettling" that Chris hadn't come to her first before purchasing the car, and Briana said it seemed like Chris wasn't ready for marriage yet although he was pretending to be.


"He's playing games and he's not taking her feelings into consideration, and it's a bunch of BS," Briana vented in a confessional.

Paige acknowledged her past with Chris had negatively impacted their current state, but she maintained optimism that things could get better. However, a part of Paige was wondering if she had fallen in love with the idea of marriage, which was all that was keeping her in this process.

Later that day, Haley asked Jacob to sit down with a tarot-card reader, who intended to read the energy of the couple's connection or lack thereof.

The spiritual advisor suggested Haley likes to be in control of the relationship and needed to release some of that control while Jacob had to drop his aggressive approach to trying to push romance and physical intimacy.

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The advisor, however, said Haley and Jacob's moon signs and life paths correlated, which signified they could definitely be compatible and develop a connection. Hearing there was hope gave Haley the nudge she needed to continue giving Jacob a chance.


Virginia then took Erik on a picnic and gushed about how she appreciated how much he said "I love you" to her. Virginia was glad to be married at first sight so that there was less risk of a man not being committed and breaking her heart.

Erik then suggested Virginia should move some of her stuff into his apartment, but she didn't want to. Virginia wanted to start fresh in a brand new place.

"Well that's going to take time. I told you that," Erik said.

"But that doesn't change the fact I don't want to move into [your apartment]," Virginia snapped.

Erik was surprised by the comment and said Virginia would have to live with him for a period of time if she wanted to stay married to him. Virginia explained she has three animals -- a dog and two cats -- and she'd be afraid to mess up his stuff.

Erik didn't like hearing that Virginia would be "uncomfortable" in his home, but Erik said they could make it "our" place.


"Her wanting to live separately is taking a step back, like, it worries me," Erik admitted to the cameras.

"She's finding excuses to not live with me, and I get the feeling she's going to get scared off and just run away... that's how she was in previous relationships, and I think about that. So it's hard."

Erik explained it would take time for him to sell his place and buy a new one because he wasn't about to have two mortgages. Virginia was hoping to compromise, but Erik insisted the compromise was living together in his place until they could find a new one together.

"I don't know what to tell you. I know where I'm going to be living after this. If you want to join me, you can come. If you want to live somewhere else, go ahead," Erik griped.

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That evening, Paige and Chris met up for a game of pool and she was excited to form a bond.


Chris said he was starting to see Paige in a different light. He thought she was beautiful with a nice body, and he noted, "I'm feeling more attracted to her. I feel like we're in a better headspace."

But when the pair sat down for a conversation, things took a turn for the worse. Paige said they hadn't been consistent in communicating, and Chris argued he had called her a few times to hang out or grab some food but she never answered her phone and seemed to be ignoring him.

Paige said she was spending time with her mother and Chris could have followed through with a text, but Chris noted that he prefers talking on the phone and "it shouldn't be so hard" to communicate with somebody in a marriage.

"I feel like from a communication standpoint, you're not trying," Chris complained. "I don't think we are doing a good job at being spouses."

Paige explained she was frustrated because Chris always seemed ready to shut the door on her, and Chris admitted what he needed emotionally was not being met.

"For you to say I'm not meeting your emotional needs, where were you when I needed you emotionally?" Paige asked.


"Granted, you don't know me from a hole in the wall and you don't owe me anything because we're still strangers, but... we are legally bound to each other. I at least expect that kind of respect, to see this process through."

Chris pointed out they were in a real marriage, not a process, and then Paige reiterated how she didn't feel Chris respected her. Chris insisted he respected Paige but they still didn't know each other or communicate well, and then he repeated how she didn't answer her phone.

Paige said whenever they met for a conversation, Chris didn't have anything to say.

"I don't have sh-t to say in-person because you don't have sh-t to say off the camera," Chris argued.

Paige lamented to the cameras about how she's a busy woman with things to do and errands to run and she shouldn't be expected to drop everything immediately once Chris calls or reaches out.

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"There's no connection. I don't have a connection with you," Chris told Paige. "We are 100 percent emotionally disconnected. I am out, gone. Mentally I am gone."

Chris added, "In another time zone, I'm gone. I want to be in a serious relationship, a serious marriage... It's been a week since we had that last conversation, and we are still in the same place. I called you five to seven times and you did not answer; that feels like rejection to me."

Chris told the cameras that Paige wasn't changing and didn't want to hang out outside of filming times, which was frustrating to him and didn't make sense."

Chris said it their relationship wasn't real and authentic, it wasn't going to be after the show.

"I feel like this is not it, and it's fine. I think we are at a dead end," Chris admitted.

Paige then burst into tears and cried about how she felt "disturbed" because she had been taking the process very seriously. Paige said Chris had everything he wanted but threw it all away.


"We didn't make it. I'm sorry," Chris told Paige as she walked away from him in tears.

On Day 31 of marriage, Vincent surprised Briana with a nice meal on a well-decorated pontoon boat in the water, and Briana said her marriage to Vincent was more than she ever could have asked for.

The couple watched back their wedding video, and Vincent said marrying a stranger ended up being "the best decision [he had] ever made in [his] life."

Briana gushed about love was truly unconditional in her relationship and she hoped to be with Vincent forever.

"I still feel giddy when I think about him, and I hope I'll still feel that joy in 40 or 50 years," Briana gushed.

Vincent said he and Briana accepted each other for who they are and he was really in love with his wife. Vincent didn't even want to be away from his wife, and he said it felt "surreal."


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On their one-month anniversary, Haley and Jacob enjoyed wine tasting at a winery, and Haley said she was still willing to put in the work with Jacob and hopefully be married to the right person. Haley felt the tarot-card reading was a reset for them.

Jacob told Haley that he felt great about them being friends as opposed to fighting all the time. Jacob realized pressing Haley in the past just "made things worse."

"Who knows, you might miss my idiotic charms at some point. We'll see," Jacob joked.

Jacob said he and Haley had been present in their relationship and things were going well, and the pair looked fondly through their wedding album together and good memories.

As Jacob looked back on his wedding, he remembered Haley had acted weird and pulled back from their first kiss at the altar. Jacob suddenly wondered whether the couple could find common ground and make a connection without any instinctually-based physical attraction.


Haley recommended to Jacob they just stay positive and move forward, but she felt a shift in Jacob's energy.

Jacob wasn't sure what he could do differently to progress his marriage, and Jacob noted, "I don't know how to approach trying to make a connection with you."

"I don't know either," Haley said.

Jacob told Haley that she looked past him, like they're not in the same room together, and he didn't think Haley even wanted a connection with him.

Jacob wished Haley would share the reasons why she wasn't attracted to him, but Haley insisted, "I've shared with you everything that I have."

"Okay, so that basically means you don't like me," Jacob said.


"No I think it means, for me, right now, there is no romantic connection, and I don't usually have a tough time connecting with people. And that's... super frustrating," Haley explained.

Jacob said he had never dated a woman who's not attracted to him and so it was difficult for him to "woo" Haley under those circumstances.

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Haley was annoyed Jacob waited one month to express that to her since he began feeling that way on Day 4, and Haley apologized for backing away early in their marriage. She said her marriage just hit a roadblock and neither person knew how to handle it going forward.

"Did either of us give that full fighting effort? I'm not sure that we did," Haley explained in a confessional.

Haley told Jacob that she needed some type of bond before she'd be cool with Jacob touching all over her, and Jacob told the cameras that Haley was two different people in the experiment and they just couldn't get on the same page.


Jacob admitted he felt "dead inside" some days, and he reminded Haley that he wasn't trying to force anything on her or touch all over her.

Jacob recalled Haley having a "disgusted sigh" the one time they just hugged, but Haley pointed out making a connection always seemed to come down to physical touch for Jacob and she wasn't comfortable with that.

"It's a hug!" Jacob complained. "You hug strangers. You smile and you're happy.

"And guess what? I don't ever have to see them again," Haley said.

"Well don't worry, in four weeks, you won't have to see me ever again," Jacob snapped.

"So what are we doing here?" Haley asked.


"I don't know," Jacob said, adding that he was "kind of done" with their annoying cycle.

"There's no resolve. It's like, 'Let's just die a slow death until we get divorced.' That's the reality of the situation. We'd have to get struck by lightning at this point and like each other to stay married."

Haley cried, saying she didn't see the relationship working out although she had given Jacob all that she could.

"I don't know where it's going to go from here. Honestly, I don't know how much I have left to give," Haley lamented in a confessional.

For their one-month anniversary, Erik took Virginia flying in a two-seater airplane. He was so excited to share his family's passion and career with his wife, and Erik gushed about how Virginia was his "everything" despite their ups and downs.

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Virginia gifted Erik with a blanket with her face and his dog Tex on it so he could travel with it as well as a coupon book with things written such as "foot massage." And Erik gave Virginia a framed photo of the GPS coordinates where they had first met on their wedding day.

Following their ride in the plane, the couple enjoyed a romantic dinner in the airplane hangar, and Erik said their relationship was going better than he ever thought it would.

And to celebrate the one-month mark of their relationship, Ryan planned a helicopter ride for Clara, which was something she had wanted to do in Las Vegas.

But Clara was frustrated she and Ryan hadn't had sex at all, and she didn't know what was going on.

Ryan insisted he was on the path to falling in love with Clara, but she still needed to hear it and hoped the "I love you" moment would happen on their one-month anniversary.

On the evening of Day 31, Paige looked through her wedding album alone but acknowledged it was probably best and and Chris didn't make it to their one-month anniversary.


Paige said marriage, kids and a family would come on God's time and she had realized it's okay to "choose yourself."

After their helicopter ride, Ryan surprised Clara with a beautiful backyard dinner under the new lights he had set up for her. Ryan decorated the table with rose petals and planned a nice meal.

At this point, Clara felt good about her marriage; however, she wanted Ryan to show his affection for her through physical intimacy rather than just little cute and thoughtful gestures here or there.

Clara didn't want to set herself up for failure, but Ryan didn't want to profess love until he truly meant it and could live by those words.

The episode concluded with Ryan and Clara watching back their wedding video.

"Reflecting on the last month, I'm not sure what I'm going to say on 'Decision Day,'" Clara confessed.


But Ryan believed his leap of faith had panned out, and he seemed to be happy in his marriage at status quo.

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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski