Married at First Sight star Derek Sherman says his marriage to Katie Conrad became "taxing" when the couple began fighting over his hopeful desires and dreams, which clashed with Katie's realistic views.
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During a recent appearance on Married at First Sight alums Jamie Otis and Doug Hehner's Hot Marriage Cool Parents podcast, Derek dished on his struggles in his marriage to Katie considering Katie had usually been the one to voice dissatisfaction and complaints.
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"It almost seems like you guys would get in a fight, argue about something, you guys would settle... [and then] something else came up. It almost seemed like [Katie] just started picking on you for no reason, and it was just picking on you and picking on you," Doug explained to Derek.
"It almost seemed like you would ease tension about something and you would ease her mind, and then she would just find something else to pick on you about. Was that the case?"
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Derek replied on the podcast, "To be honest, yeah!"
"The marriage started becoming taxing," Derek explained.
"I started finding myself doing the same thing that I did as a child when I was dealing with tough situations, which was just like, you know, only looking for the bright side of things."
Derek's parents divorced when he was younger, and he disclosed on Married at First Sight's tenth season he tries to embrace his childhood during his adult years to make up for lost time and hardships he had faced.
"I was still dealing with the situations as they came [with Katie], but being stressed over something is never going to help you. You've got to have faith in the future, like, I'm a big advocate of having hope," Derek continued.
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"And unfortunately, Katie with her, I suppose, realistic views and me trying to be optimistic all the time, that ended up backfiring and she felt like we were on different pages."
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Derek told Jamie and Doug that he was just "trying to alleviate the stress" when he and Katie would frequently fight.
"I don't want both of us to be having negative attitudes towards something, because then nothing is ever going to get resolved," Derek said.
"It did feel like anything I did would always have some side effects. Looking back on it, I really felt like I started kind of withdrawing a little bit from some minor actions from how I usually am -- because I just felt like, 'Well, if I act like this, then she's just going to hate that or that, so let me try to be a bit more composed.'"
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Derek even said Katie had once expressed to him that she wasn't a big fan of his over-the-top personality.
"She even kind of told me at one point in time that I threw a little bit too much of my personality right out from the door. And at least for me, I felt like right out of the door, this is who I am, and if it's meant to be, this is how it will work out," Derek shared.
"But she expressed that I came out with a little too strong of a personality, and so I tried toning that back a little bit."
Katie admitted on a March episode of Married at First Sight: Unfiltered that she became less attracted to Derek the more she got to know him, especially because of his boy-like wonder, but Derek said he didn't appreciate Katie's unwillingness to support his goals and aspirations.
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While Derek admitted on Hot Marriage Cool Parents some of his dreams -- like building connecting tree houses or composing a Christmas song -- are a little "silly," he believes spouses should lift each other up and support one another in their endeavors.
Katie was primarily focused on marriage and raising children down the road, but Derek insisted his family would have remained his No. 1 priority no matter what and it's important for spouses to maintain their individual identities in a marriage.
Although Derek and Katie opted to stay married on "Decision Day" at the end of Married at First Sight's eight-week experiment, the couple revealed they had split during the reunion special, which aired in late April on Lifetime.
Katie complained Derek was "fake" and her marriage lacked physical intimacy because Derek allegedly never initiated in the bedroom, but Derek vented about how Katie had allegedly cheated on him twice with her ex-boyfriend -- once after their honeymoon and then again about two weeks after "Decision Day."
Katie admitted to having a physical "slip-up" with her ex after "Decision Day," but she completely denied ever having an affair once she and Derek returned to Washington, D.C. from their honeymoon in Panama.
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Not only did Katie cheat on Derek at least once, but she also went out for drinks with Mindy Shiben's husband on Season 10, Zach Justice, shortly before Married at First Sight premiered in early January.
Katie has therefore received backlash ever since the reunion special aired on Lifetime.
Also during his interview on the podcast, Derek explained when his marriage to Katie began going downhill and why he decided to reveal Katie cheated on him with her ex-boyfriend despite initially agreeing not to discuss it on Season 10's reunion special.
In addition, Derek also revealed he feels Katie likely had no intention of remaining married to him despite proclaiming her desire to do so on "Decision Day."
While Derek remains single, Katie has moved on and has a new boyfriend, Brandon Eaves, with whom she went Instagram official on Monday.
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