Married at First Sight star Jacob Harder says Haley Harris' refusal to hug him was weird given she was willing to hug other guys while they were married.
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However, as Haley got to know Jacob and his personality better, she pushed him away and began guarding herself from getting close to him or developing any time of deep connection.
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On the March 3 episode of Married at First Sight: Unfiltered, Jacob and his Married at First Sight co-stars Briana Myles and Paige Banks watched back a Season 12 clip in which Jacob and Haley discussed the lack of physical intimacy in their relationship during a counseling session with show expert Pastor Calvin Roberson after they honeymoon phase of the process.
"Is there anything physical or intimate between the two of you?" Pastor Cal asks in the clip.
"Not currently," Haley replies.
"Yeah, not right now," Jacob agrees.
When asked if that situation was "okay" with the both of them, Haley explains, "I'm just not a big physical-touch person."
Jacob said he suggested to Haley they should at least try to hug once a day, especially since they're married and probably even hug strangers, but Haley admitted she wasn't comfortable with that.
"I hugged you guys when I walked in," Pastor Cal jokes.
"So that was to me, was like, 'Okay, I don't know if she actually likes me, and what am I doing?" Jacob admits.
And Haley acknowledged she understood where Jacob was coming from.
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On Unfiltered, host Jamie Otis -- who starred on Season 1 of Married at First Sight -- asked Jacob what he believed was the root of his marital issues with Haley.
"Umm, I'm not really sure," Jacob admitted. "She's really guarded around me and we're sort of just in [different] rooms and there is no real pipeline to building anything."
Considering Haley wasn't even open to the idea of hugging Jacob, Jamie asked, "Do you think she's fully open to the process of getting to know you more?"
"I don't know, the hug thing is pretty weird, to be honest with you," Jacob said, "because I was really trying to, like, open her up during the honeymoon and that's when I presented the hug thing."
"And she didn't participate in the hug, she just kind of sat there," Jacob recalled with a laugh.
"And we went out the other night and she was, like, hugging these other guys at the bar with her friends and, you know, having a great old time. So I'm like, 'Okay.'"
Jamie then asked Briana and Paige for their thoughts on Jacob and Haley as a match.
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"It's just like they both have had a give and take in this marriage."
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Jacob said Haley really needed to let her guard down for their marriage to work out long-term.
"She is not comfortable at all being vulnerable, and I think if you are going to do something like get married at first sight, you have to sort of bite the bullet and just tumble all the way down the rabbit hole," Jacob explained.
"You know what I mean? I think that would be a key for us, and then maybe eventually she will accidentally start trusting him or liking me -- we'll see how it goes."
Not only did Haley pull away from Jacob during their honeymoon, but Jacob also accused Haley of being "high-strung" and lying to him about having a girls' night when some of the other MAFS grooms were in attendance.
Haley insisted the outing was supposed to be a girls' night and some of the guys just showed up without her knowledge, but Jacob lost trust in his wife at that point and even allegedly accused her of having a boyfriend back home.
Haley therefore decided to not even sit next to Jacob on the plane ride back to Atlanta, GA, and she said on a recent episode of Unfiltered that she was "not really vibing" with Jacob or his personality at this point.
Jacob and Haley still moved into an apartment together and slept in different bedrooms at first, but then Jacob apologized for his actions.
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Haley admitted she felt "drained" but there was still a chance "for something positive to come out of this."
On the latest episode of Married at First Sight's twelfth season, Haley vented to her friend Lauren about how she and Jacob had communication issues and she started backing off due to his obsession with the 80s and "goofy" wardrobe.
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Meanwhile, Jacob feared that if the roles reversed and Haley finally let her walls down and opened up to him, he might be checked out of the marriage by that point and hurt her.
Jacob was admittedly dealing with many insecurities because Haley had allegedly been acting cold towards him.
But Jacob and Haley found themselves in a better place when hosting a housewarming party at their new apartment.
Jacob's friend explained to Haley that Jacob is a standup guy who's straightforward and fails to pick up on social cues sometimes, and Jacob was warned that Haley was a bit of a commitment phobe who had the tendency to shut down prematurely in relationships.
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
