Married at First Sight star Jamie Otis has revealed she's been diagnosed with post-partum depression and was "terrified" to admit it.
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"I was diagnosed with post-partum depression at my 6 wk check up..I'm super comfortable being transparent about most things, but this one I've been terrified to admit out loud," Jamie wrote.
"I'm scared of looking weak. I feel like there's such a stigma associated with mental illness. When I heard the doc speak the words 'post-partum depression' I instantly felt like I wasn't good enough or strong enough to fight the hormones. (The nurse in me *knows* that's not the case -- and I'm working on fighting this feeling."
Jamie shared, however, a mood disorder is not a new concept for her.
"I've struggled with depression for forever so this isn't entirely new to me. I don't talk about it much bc I've always felt 'less than' bc of it -- or like I'm diseased -- which is kinda funny bc I have no shame in sharing about my HPV diagnosis," Jamie continued in her post from late last week.
"When I think of the person I want to be it isn't a depressed Debbie-downer. I want to be the happy one always encouraging others and making them smile. When I think of the kind of MOM I want to be, I want to be the attentive one who never tires of getting down and playing with my kiddos."
Jamie admitted she's afraid her mental illness is eventually going to drown out her personality and energy.
"I think that's what scares me most -- my mom has tried fighting mental illness for years & I've watched it take her over at times. I'm petrified it will take over me too," Jamie shared.
"I guess I thought if I didn't say it out loud maybe it'd just go away. But, it doesn't work like that. So here I am admitting my truth. I'm saying it out loud. I *will not* let it take me over."
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Jamie noted her mother "tried her absolute best" but she never took medication or went to therapy. Jamie also said her mother never had any support from anyone.
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"These are things I am so fortunate to have access to. I am committed to coming out of this funk stronger, happier, & a better mom. I'm also vowing to be more open about my struggles with depression & anxiety bc it affects far too many of us," Jamie continued.
"I'm a true believer in speaking our truths & sharing them bc it takes a heavy weight off our shoulders. Life can be tough but none of us have to go through these struggles alone. If you're silently struggling too, I'm here for you."
Jamie concluded her post with the following hashtags: "#ppd #postpartumdepression #mentalhealthawareness #fourthtrimester #rawmotherhood #motherhood."
But Jamie insisted several days later she is feeling good and "not missing out" on any special moments with her babies because "tomorrow isn't promised."
"I'm definitely my biggest, but I'm not going to stop wearing bikinis that match Gracies!" Jamie wrote Sunday on Instagram alongside a photo of her lifting up her daughter Henley Grace, who turns three next month.
"I am working on becoming healthy & strong again, but I have no time limit on myself and there's no number I'm trying to 'get down to.' I just want to *feel* healthy again... Who cares about bumpy legs and a round belly anyway!!?"
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Jamie and Doug married as complete strangers on Married at First Sight's debut season in 2014.
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The couple initially announced Hayes as their son's name in April, but they changed his name to Hendrix once they were able to meet him, hold him and see his face.
Hendrix's home birth on May 13 was shown in a June episode of Married at First Sight: Couples Cam, which is set to resume soon on Lifetime after several weeks of no Wednesday night episodes.
Hendrix was nine pounds and four ounces when born, and Jamie confirmed she had no epidural or anesthetic when in labor.
Jamie admitted to Entertainment Tonight that natural childbirth was a far different experience from when she had her first child, Henley, in August 2017.
Following their stint on Married at First Sight's first season, Jamie and Doug co-starred on Married at First Sight: The First Year, a spinoff which continued to follow the two MAFS Season 1 couples who opted to remain together during their first year of marriage.
Jamie and Doug also later starred on Married at First Sight: Jamie and Doug Plus One, their own spinoff which premiered in December 2017.
Jamie now serves as the host of Married at First Sight: Unfiltered, the show's post-episode discussion show that also airs on Lifetime, and she and Doug often appear on Married at First Sight: Couples Couch, which features former MAFS couples offering commentary on encore broadcasts of the show.
Lifetime is currently airing Married at First Sight's eleventh season on Wednesday nights followed by Married at First Sight: Australia on Thursday nights.
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
