Nick Viall has revealed four of the 22 roses he handed out during The Bachelor premiere went to women he didn't get to know much at all.
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The women "put their lives on hold for me... As flattered as I was to have 30 women show up to meet me, things got overwhelming -- and fast. These women were beautiful and intelligent, and I became nervous I couldn't give them the best version of me," Nick wrote in his People blog.
"It was really intimidating to get to know so many women with the time restriction of one night before the first Rose Ceremony. The hardest part of that evening was making sure I was having meaningful conversations that were more than just a couple minutes."
Nick appreciated how the women attempted to steal some one-on-one time with him while understanding there was only one of him to go around.
"Watching the episode makes it hard to see women like [Jasmine Goode] having a difficult time. I know how hard it is to be on that side of things, and I completely understand how it can make anyone emotional," Nick said, referencing the bachelorette's tears over her lack of time with him.
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"As the night was coming to an end I could feel the anxiety around the house."
When host Chris Harrison pulled The Bachelor star into a different room in order to begin the season's first Rose Ceremony, Nick confessed he "hadn't had the chance to speak with" four women yet -- Jaimi King, Dominique Alexis, Elizabeth Whitelaw and Kristina Schulman.
Nick therefore made a huge strategic decision that some bachelorettes might deem unfair.
"I decided I was going to give roses to the four women I hadn't been able to speak with," Nick revealed.
"It felt wrong to make any decision regarding those women without talking with them. [Astrid Loch] was right; it felt almost impossible to feel completely confident in any of my decisions with such little time with each of the women. I had to trust my gut and follow my heart."
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Nick put an idea into perspective that helped him make such difficult decisions.
"I focused on the thought that if there was any part of me that was willing to say goodbye now, then that person wouldn't be the one for me," Nick disclosed.
Looking back on Night 1, Nick said 29 of the introductions were some of the best he's ever had in his life. (He didn't include Liz Sandoz, whom he had met -- and had sex with -- before at her best friend Jade Roper's January 2016 wedding).
"Those first introductions were so amazing, and watching it all over again in the episode is so fun and brings back some awesome memories. I thought back to when I came out of the limo myself and wished I had come up with something more memorable," Nick explained in his People blog.
"Don't get me wrong, every woman in that 30 was beautiful and intriguing, but it was the big gestures that caught my attention and left a mark on who they were."
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski