The Bachelorette alum Rachel Lindsay has broken her silence and revealed what bothered her the most about Bryan Abasolo's behavior days after finalizing her divorce.
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"I'm divorced. Thank you, God," Rachel, 39, said during the Friday, January 10 episode of her "Higher Learning" podcast.
"Give me some freedom music -- some freedom music!"
Rachel explained to her co-host Van Lathan how it's "a very weird feeling" to be officially single again.
"From the moment he finally left the house, after being here for seven months post-separation, I felt divorced," Rachel said. "But for me, I'll be honest, there's a lot I want to say."
Rachel reiterated how her divorce is "final" and has been "filed."
The Bachelorette alum elaborated, "There have been a lot of people talking without me saying anything, and that is because there is an intention behind that. I want to respond to everything being said; there is a lot of stuff that is not accurate."
Rachel promised that she "will" share her side of the story but she's "figuring all that out" right now.
"There are so many things that I want to address, but this is all I'm going to say right now," Rachel began.
"There comes a point in a divorce when someone is fighting you in this way and willing to die on every hill and not willing to compromise at all for whatever reason they have -- and [I'll] talk about that later. But you have to, at one point, let go and just be the bigger person and prioritize what is most important to you."
Rachel said she had to determine whether it was most important to be vindictive and hateful or just to protect her peace of mind and let go.
RELATED LINK: 'THE BACHELORETTE' COUPLES NOW"To me, the latter is priceless," Rachel noted.
"For me, I had to say, 'I'm trying to move on,' and I had to make concessions that I didn't necessarily want to do... I really want to start rebuilding, and I want to move forward. And I'm able to do that now, and that feels really, really good."
Rachel said there is no price on rebuilding, healing and starting fresh in life.
"I think the thing that's bothered me the most is that on his end, there were certain things that were said to play into certain stereotypes that really were hurtful or bothered me," Rachel confessed.
"[He was] saying things that particularly play into the stereotype of me being an angry Black female... and a career woman that were intentionally done to try to win over the media, and it was really hard to see people run with that narrative that couldn't be more false."
Rachel denied putting her career before her marriage and wanting to have children.
"Those things are emphatically so not true, and to see people run with that -- because it's the low-hanging fruit and it fits a certain stereotype -- were really hurtful," Rachel admitted.
"And I can't wait to fully talk about those things."
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"It's, like, changed my whole perspective on everything," The Bachelorette alum shared.
"I don't even know if I would get married again. I can't even fathom that. It's interesting. And because of the divorce, it has changed my timeline on things because financially, it's just so different for me now."
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In addition, Rachel said she's no longer able to do the things that she had really wanted to do.
"That's also really disheartening, even though I allegedly didn't want them or prioritize them," Rachel said, seemingly referring to having a baby.
After more than four years of marriage, Bryan had filed for divorce from Rachel on January 2, 2024, citing irreconcilable differences, and he listed December 31, 2024 as their date of separation.
Rachel had been ordered in July 2024 to pay Bryan more than $13,000 per month in temporary spousal support, but according to new court documents obtained by the newspaper, Bryan has released the Season 13 The Bachelorette star from "any and all" future payments.
However, Bryan has been awarded the pair's home in Miami, FL, as well as his 2021 Honda Accord.
Rachel, meanwhile, will be able to keep her engagement and wedding rings along with her North Hollywood, CA, home and 2023 Porsche Macan.
Bryan and Lindsay -- who did not have a prenuptial agreement -- are also responsible for paying their own attorney's fees aside from the $20,000 that Rachel had already contributed toward Bryan's legal counsel in September 2024.
Rachel and Bryan initially reached a divorce agreement in September 2024.
Rachel admitted in December 2024 that she felt "shame" amid her divorce from the chiropractor.
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When asked to pinpoint the moment when her marriage began going downhill, Rachel shared on The View, "It's even hard to publicly admit it now, but I would say maybe I saw signs before the marriage."
Rachel went on to confess, "As women, we're fixers. We think we can figure it out. They're a challenge to us, but eventually, I saw it more, I would say, within two years."
Rachel explained how her identity became "wrapped up in the relationship."
"And you're afraid that's the only way people see you," she noted at the time. "But I'm here to tell you, it's not. You can take your power back. You can find your power within. No one has to dim your light."
In September 2024, Rachel told Us Weekly that she wasn't ready to enter the dating pool again.
"Honestly, it's not a focus right now," Rachel said last year. "I'm just trying to get through it. Then, get at me."
Bryan shared some personal details about his divorce from The Bachelorette's Season 13 star in a July 2024 YouTube interview with men's divorce coach Rene Garcia.
"I was sleeping in a different bedroom. We were already going to marriage counseling," Bryan described of what his relationship with Rachel was like in 2023.
When therapy "seemed to be working" for the pair, Bryan said that he put the divorce on hold -- until "things just went right back to the way they were."
Bryan admitted he and Rachel had an "unhealthy communication pattern" and they "didn't spend enough time" with each other.
"I mean, in my estimation, we saw what the other person was doing in the relationship, mainly on Instagram, although we lived in the same house," Bryan explained at the time.
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"That was one of the toughest things I ever had to do in my life," Bryan recalled of officially filing to end his marriage.
"How I felt when I did it, I felt like I was being blindfolded and then suddenly I was able to see sunlight. It was uncomfortable and then there was the other end of the spectrum, there was all this fear that entered my body."
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Bryan admitted he had been stuck "in a weird friend-zone situation for a while" and the pair had interests and priorities that no longer aligned.
Rachel had claimed she was shocked by Bryan's divorce filing, but Bryan insisted that she definitely saw it coming.
"[Rachel] never showed any interest in my business," Bryan alleged, adding how The Bachelorette alum's "jet-setting career often took her away from our martial residence" while he stayed home."
Bryan further alleged that Rachel didn't want him to be involved in her Hollywood lifestyle and would go so far as to "disinvite [him] to parties or events" and show up with friends instead.
"There came a time where I needed to stop letting circumstances and my fear delay what was inevitably going to happen," Bryan said.
During a December 2023 appearance on "The Viall Files" podcast, Rachel revealed to Nick Viall that she and Bryan had been "working on having a kid" together, although they were living "totally different lives" and didn't "work well together."
Bryan told Rene that it was "tough" and "hard" to watch Rachel struggle with fertility issues when they were trying so hard to expand their family.
"It felt terrible. Just watching her sadness, it broke my heart," Bryan admitted. "It was like I was failing expectations on all fronts."
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"Women have a different biological clock than us. It was going to be me going along with a plan, but I was under a hell of a lot of stress," he acknowledged.
During a June 2024 appearance on the "Hidden Gems with Natasha Parker" podcast, Rachel revealed that she had "wanted" a prenuptial agreement before marrying Bryan, but the pair "weren't on the same page" about it.
"I didn't want it to be a bigger issue, so we didn't have one," Rachel admitted.
"Hindsight is 20/20, I would have done it [looking back now]. I always wanted to do it, but, again, we weren't on the same page when it came to that."
Rachel said the reason she didn't force one was because they were in a different place financially at the time and their careers were "more level." Rachel also wasn't living in California at that point.
Rachel and Bryan had gotten engaged on The Bachelorette's thirteenth season, which aired 2017, and then they got married in August 2019. At that time, Rachel was an attorney from Texas and Bryan was working as a chiropractor in Miami.
After Bryan and Rachel's wedding, Rachel briefly moved to Miami to be with Bryan. Rachel then relocated to California for a job at Extra, resulting in the pair trying to make a long-distance marriage work.
Bryan, apparently believing he and Rachel were a team, subsequently moved from Florida to Los Angeles, CA, for the sake of Rachel's entertainment career, which now includes multiple podcasts and two books. (Rachel no longer works for Extra).
"I placed my career as a chiropractor on hold to move twice for Rachel's career. These moves were detrimental to my chiropractic business, while Rachel's income and success as a media personality skyrocketed," Bryan wrote in a May 2024 court filing, according to Us.
Bryan also wrote, "I want to move out of our Family Residence as soon as possible, but maintaining our standard of living is not financially feasible at this time... [And she is] refusing to give me access to any of our community property funds to pay my divorce lawyer, my forensic accountant, or any of my personal expenses."
Rachel subsequently asked the court to seal her financial details from the public eye, claiming that filing them could "potentially cause irreparable harm," as well as seal redacted portions of Bryan's request for spousal support and attorney's fees filed on May 1.
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"It is a happy ending in the sense that I'm doing what's best for me, and with divorce -- even if it's mutual -- there's a bit of a selfish decision in it, but I'm doing what's best for me and that's a happy ending," Rachel noted on Natasha's podcast.
"Right now as I'm going through it. No, it's not happy, it's messy -- unnecessarily messy -- but when I get through it I'm going to have to rebuild and I'm going to have to restructure, but it's a happy ending because it's what I want."
When Bryan announced his divorce filing in January, he wrote on Instagram, "If you've been following me for a while, you know I don't like to put my personal affairs on social media and like to keep a safe space for our family."
"Many of you know me as a chiropractor," he elaborated, "and also as a husband, my proudest role so far. After more than 4 years of marriage, Rachel and I have made the difficult decision to part ways and start anew."
The chiropractor continued, "My parents have been married forever and I'm a family man, but sometimes loving yourself and your partner means you must let go."
Bryan wrote how he wanted fans to "hear it from the source" before reading about his breakup with Rachel in "the blogs," allowing people to make up "their own reality."
Bryan concluded of his estranged wife, "Please respect the spaces of our family and friends as we figure out our next steps. Respectfully, Bryan."
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
