The Bachelor alum Ben Higgins has shared how waiting until marriage to sleep with Jessica Clarke changed their relationship.
|
ADVERTISEMENT
|
RELATED LINK: 'THE BACHELOR' FRANCHISE COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER?? (PHOTOS)
"There's multiple angles to why that decision was made, right," explained Ben, who married Jessica in November 2021.
"I think people hear it from the outside and they assume it was strictly a faith decision, or a religious decision might be the better way to explain that. It wasn't solely that."
The Season 20 The Bachelor star said while both he and his wife believe in Jesus, which is "something that is at the foundation [and] the corner" of their lives, there was more to their decision to not be intimate for so long.
"[Jesus] is what we try to have everything come out of. We also, because of that, do believe that sex is sacred," Ben said.
"We believe it is something very powerful, something very important to consider and hold dear, to talk about, to express. We also believe it's an awesome thing. It's a gift."
Ben confirmed that Jessica had "held sex dear" and "abstained from sex her whole life."
"So when I entered that relationship with her... we both talked it out and said, 'What is the wise thing to do here for us?'" Ben recalled, given he had sex before Jessica.
"It was, 'Hey, you've worked so hard to keep this moment special for you and I have had failed relationships where that has been a part of my life. And so, let's try. Like, let's see what happens there because we have a whole life together.'"
But Ben pointed out how the couple never anticipated the coronavirus pandemic would delay their plans when they got engaged in March 2020.
RELATED LINK: 'THE BACHELORETTE' COUPLES NOW: WHOM DID 'THE BACHELORETTE' STARS AND THEIR BACHELOR PICKS ULTIMATELY END UP WITH?! (PHOTOS)
FOLLOW REALITY TV WORLD ON THE ALL-NEW GOOGLE NEWS!
Reality TV World is now available on the all-new Google News app and website. Click here to visit our Google News page, and then click FOLLOW to add us as a news source!
"We didn't think COVID was going to shut down our wedding for a year-and-a-half," Ben explained. "So the big joke on us was, 'Hey, let's wait a year longer than you expected!'"
"So the question was what came of that? It wasn't easy. So it forced us to grow stronger together in our commitment to each other. It also got us really excited for when we did get married."
Ben revealed of his wedding night, "There was something very special there, something that we were going to work through as a married couple when we had already committed our lives to each other."
And because that physical part of a relationship was "not an option" while they were dating and engaged, Ben said, "It forced us and allowed us to communicate with our words a lot easier. And so we talked things out -- we talked the weird things out, the uncomfortable things out."
Ben reiterated how he and Jessica spent their time together talking or having experiences.
Ben, however, acknowledged that the way they went about their romance will not work for everybody and he's not pushing his beliefs on others.
"I would actually very much push against [doing] that and say, 'This is a decision you need to make if it is right for you.' But for us, it was right, and it feels right," Ben elaborated.
"It feels like it was a healthy decision and I'm really glad. I'm proud of myself that I was able to respect my wife and her decision... and I'm proud of her because now it's very healthy and we have that special bond that existed once we got married."
ADVERTISEMENT
RELATED LINK: 'THE BACHELOR' COUPLES NOW: WHO DID 'THE BACHELOR' STARS AND THEIR BACHELORETTE PICKS ACTUALLY END UP MARRYING? (PHOTOS)
Ben got engaged to Lauren Bushnell during his The Bachelor season finale in 2016, and then the pair starred on a spinoff, Ben & Lauren: Happily Ever After?, which aired on Freeform and featured them planning a wedding.
But Ben came down with a case of cold feet, and he and Lauren called off their engagement and split in May 2017.
Following his breakup with Lauren, Ben also appeared on The Bachelor: Winter Games, which aired on ABC in 2018, but he quit the spinoff after admitting he was still struggling to get over his relationship with Lauren and wasn't ready to date again yet.
Ben and Jessica's relationship began in December 2018 when Ben apparently saw Jessica's photo from a hockey game she had gone to with her father and decided to direct message her on Instagram.
After chatting on FaceTime, the pair met in person and Ben asked her to be his girlfriend.
Ben and Jessica went Instagram official in January 2019.
They continued to make a long-distance relationship work, with Ben being in Denver most of the time and Jessica living in Nashville, where she attended esthetics school.
Ben proposed marriage to Jessica in early 2020, and then they purchased their first home together in Denver in December of that year.
Ben and Jessica had to postpone their initial 2020 wedding due to the coronavirus pandemic, but they ended up getting married in a "simple and beautiful" wedding ceremony at The Estate in Cherokee Dock near Nashville in November 2021.
Ben has said he and Jessica are now looking to expand their family; however, they are in no rush to have children and decided to start with a dog named Waylon.
Jessica has stayed by Ben's side even during the most difficult times, such as a "breakdown" in Summer 2021 that left Ben soul-searching and reaching out to family and friends for support.
ADVERTISEMENT
For Lauren's part, the Season 20 The Bachelor alum is married with one child to country singer Chris Lane.
Before starring on The Bachelor, Ben competed for Kaitlyn Bristowe's heart on The Bachelorette's eleventh season. Ben hinted on the "Talking It Out" podcast how he had slept with Kaitlyn during Fantasy Suites, which is something she had also alluded to last month on the "Guys We F****d" podcast.
RELATED LINK: 'THE BACHELOR' FRANCHISE COUPLES NOW: WHO IS STILL TOGETHER?? (PHOTOS)
Interested in more The Bachelor news? Join our The Bachelor Facebook Group!
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
