The Bachelor alum Ben Higgins has shed new light on what he claims went wrong with Lauren Bushnell that resulted in their split and calling off their engagement.
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"Lauren said she met [her now husband Chris Lane] while she was with you," Ashley Iaconetti told her podcast co-host.
"She did say that, yeah?" asked Ben, who got engaged to Lauren on The Bachelor's Season 20 finale, which aired in March 2016.
"Yeah," Ashley confirmed.
"Good for them," Ben replied with an awkward laugh.
When Ashley asked Ben if this was truly news to him, Ben admitted, "I did know this. This was very clear to me."
Ben explained to Ashley, "If you would've asked me this... when this podcast started, I would've probably been frozen and ended up in tears. I just would've!"
Ben acknowledged his split from his ex-fiancee was "very emotional back then" for him, but now he's glad things worked out the way they did because he's happily married to a beautiful brunette outside of Bachelor Nation, Jessica Clarke.
"But it doesn't mean it didn't come without pain. The thing that I do want to say, in protection of myself -- for the first time ever -- is I took it on the chin, for the both of us and for the good of the cause," Ben shared on his podcast.
"Back then, I remember, because of our Ben and Lauren: Happily Ever After? [spinoff], it made me look like I had cold feet. Did I have cold feet? Yes. Because I knew we weren't right for each other! Things weren't going down a path that seemed like a happily-engaged couple should be going down."
Ben said he felt like "that show" and "the public perception" made it seem like he was the one who ended his relationship with Lauren.
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"You think so? Maybe it's because I know too much, that I thought it was more..." Ashley began.
"But it felt like the relationship ended because I wasn't ready to take the steps forward that the show was really asking us to take," Ben interjected.
"They were like, 'Hey, let's have your wedding on TV, let's televise it, let's pay you to do it.' And I said, 'No.'"
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Ben apparently knew in his heart, at that time, that his relationship was "not going to work."
He added, "We both knew this, and we were both very clear on this. [We said], 'This is not a relationship that either of us are going to pursue. We know that we don't have much time left. In fact, we're trying to hold this together by a thread!'"
Ben said that thread was definitely "breaking" with each passing day.
"And so, I hope Lauren will not be mad at me for saying this, but we did not end because I had cold feet," Ben revealed. "That was not the reason."
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"It wasn't [fair] because it wasn't true to me," Ben shared. "We just weren't right for each other."
Even though Ben and Lauren's Freeform spinoff made it look like Ben had backed out of his wedding, Ashley argued that the public thought his breakup with Lauren was mutual or that the former flight attendant had cut ties "because she was the one who got a boyfriend kind of quickly afterward, who was not Chris Lane."
A source close to Lauren told E! News in May 2017 that Ben and Lauren just "wanted different things," and that Ben "would have kept wanting to make it work" and so their split was "really sad."
And Ben agreed on his podcast it was "a very mutual" decision to part ways and end their engagement.
"It was a mutual breakup... but you can see the beauty in the breakup now," Ben shared.
"Maybe not at the time, but the beauty is that it ended, it wasn't easy, it wasn't fun... but I know over time, it is a piece of my life that I'm also very thankful for."
Ben said he now looks back fondly on "that season of life" and says he's glad they tried.
"I have no emotion wrapped around my past relationship with Lauren [now]," The Bachelor alum insisted. "You could not get me to cry [now]."
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Also during Ben and Ashley's podcast episode, Ben admitted he's "frustrated" by Lauren's recent comments on The Bachelorette alum Shawn Booth's "In the Booth" podcast that essentially trivialized and devalued their relationship.
Lauren told Shawn in late July how her feelings for Ben weren't as intense as the love Shawn felt for Kaitlyn Bristowe because Lauren was so young when she competed on The Bachelor.
"I feel like you maybe had deeper feelings [for Kaitlyn than I did for Ben] and maybe it's because you were older," Lauren said.
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Lauren also admitted she initially went on The Bachelor to "travel" to "amazing destinations" and "eat food" as her first two priorities. She listed meeting Ben as the third item on her list of The Bachelor pros or benefits.
"I did think Ben was so cute, like, he's a handsome guy. He just seemed so nice and normal and [we have] similar values," Lauren said. "So I was like, 'That's a plus,' but really, I wanted to travel!"
Ben married Jessica in November 2021, and Lauren wed Chris in October 2019. Lauren and Chris now share two sons, Dutton and Baker.
"Personally, I hear her now say that maybe love feels differently for her than it did back on her time on the show. And I go, 'I'm glad! Like, you're married with kids. I'm married [too] and, like, yes, love does feel different,'" Ben confirmed.
"I'm glad you're in love with your husband more than you liked me -- or if you liked me at all, like, I'm just glad you like him! That's cool!"
But Ben confessed Lauren "should've gone home" and quit The Bachelor if she wasn't sure about him or serious about their relationship and future together.
"That show was really real for me... I invested, personally, a lot of effort into trying to figure out if it was the path that was going to help me find my partner or not," noted Ben, who also had a brief stint on The Bachelor Winter Games.
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
