The Bachelor star Chris Soules admits Ashley Iaconetti planted seeds in his mind during her two-on-one date with Kelsey Poe right before her elimination.
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"I do feel [Ashley] was just not ready for the kind of commitment I'm ready for. Also, like I said to her, I just couldn't imagine her being happy in my world," the 33-year-old farmer from Arlington, IA, wrote in his People blog.
"Now, when she threw out [Britt Nilsson]'s name and asked if I thought she was ready for life on the farm, that completely caught me off guard. It definitely planted seeds that came back to haunt me the next week, but you'll have to see that for yourself."
Nilsson has been a frontrunner from the very beginning and Soules hasn't been good at hiding it. The Bachelor whisked her away for alone time, gave her gifts, and offered her special attention and extra romantic dates.
On Monday night's group date, the girls had to write lyrics and perform a country song for Soules.
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"Britt's singing brought actual tears to my eyes. I felt her words... I do feel bad about how cozy Britt and I were in front of [Jade Roper] and some of the other girls. Yes, I'm an idiot. But dating multiple women at once is not easy! It's not like I had a lot of practice with this kind of thing before I was the Bachelor," Soules explained.
"Regardless, I should have been more aware of who could see me when I was with her, and I should have been more conscious of not letting my feelings and impulses take over. All I can say is that I am glad I will never have to go on a group date ever again. Those things are awkward."
Later that night, Soules admitted he was "really torn" about which girl to take to the Big & Rich concert.
"I decided I was just going to go with my gut, choose when it felt right and spend the night getting to know the girls better... when I sat down with Britt, it just felt right to take her. I really didn't want the other girls to know about it because I didn't want to make them feel bad, so we slipped out," explained Soules, who disappeared with Nilsson for over an hour.
When Soules and Nilsson returned to the group date's party together -- and Nilsson was carrying a rose -- the atmosphere was extremely tense and uncomfortable.
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"I felt like the girls' eyes were lasers, tearing me up. Listen, I know what it feels like not to receive a rose on a group date. It sucks. But I didn't expect the girls to react the way they did. I really didn't know what to say, and, at that point, it was clear that there was truly nothing I could do to make them feel better, so I just thought it was best for me to say goodnight," Soules wrote.
"I had no idea Britt would tell them all about the concert. I thought that was something we could have kept between the two of us to soften the blow on the girls. Either way, she told them, and hearing [Carly Waddell] say she felt invisible and seeing [Kaitlyn Bristowe] and [Whitney Bischoff] in tears broke my heart. I really didn't mean to cause anyone pain that night. At that point, I didn't think anything could get worse that week. Clearly, I was wrong."
Also in his blog, Soules teased what's to come next week and it's going to get "even more intense" if possible.
"First, there's still a Rose Ceremony. Who else, if anybody, did I say goodbye to?" Soules said. "On Sunday night, not only do I sit down with Chris Harrison to reveal a few secrets and answer some tough questions, but I also take the girls home to Iowa, which was probably the biggest turning point for me in the entire journey. And on Monday, I go to the remaining four girls' hometowns."
The Bachelor will air a special two-night event on Sunday, February 15 and Monday, February 16.
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski