The Bachelorette alum Becca Kufrin has slammed trolls claiming she was "desperate" in choosing to turn the tables and propose marriage to Thomas Jacobs.
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Becca and Thomas, who fell for each other on Bachelor in Paradise's seventh season last summer, announced their engagement in late May, but it wasn't Thomas who popped the question.
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Instead, Becca planned a romantic picnic for Thomas and gave him a ring as well as her heart. She asked her boyfriend to spend the rest of his life with her, and Thomas said yes.
Considering the woman in a relationship doesn't typically propose marriage, Becca and Thomas shared what the reaction has been during a recent episode of Becca's "Bachelor Happy Hour" podcast, which she co-hosts with Michelle Young.
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Thomas said when sharing the news with family and friends, there were two "common" phrases people would use: "no way" and "that's awesome."
And Michelle agreed, saying, "It's so untraditional, which I love. And it's so empowering."
"It pushes people to think outside [the box] and in different ways," Michelle added. "Everyone feels like the man should be proposing to the woman, especially coming from a show where that is very much the tradition."
While Michelle joins Thomas' family and friends in loving and admiring Becca's grand gesture, there has been quite a bit of criticism and judgment.
"We've seen a lot of love from people, but I've also seen comments where people are like, 'She's desperate. I would never allow a woman to propose to the man. I would never do this,'" Becca said.
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"And it's like, 'Cool, that's you, but why as a female, why does it make me desperate to want to propose to somebody?' If Thomas, in a week, were to do the same exact thing, no one would say he's desperate."
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Becca expressed how allegations she's desperate "just don't make sense" to her.
"The logic is just not there. Love is love, and every relationship, it's vastly different -- so why not let us do what works for us?" Becca shared.
"And I knew [Thomas] would be so appreciative and supportive of it, and that he would never be offended if the female proposed to the man. So it's like, 'Why should that matter, who does it?'"
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Becca also revealed she has seen a woman propose marriage before.
"Here's the thing. Usually, it's very traditional that the man proposes to the woman, but I remember being in eighth grade and at dance, and at the recital, my ballet teacher proposed to her now-husband," Becca recalled.
"I remember as an eighth grader... My first thought was, 'Oh, that's weird.' And then I was like, 'That's kind of cool!' I still remember that moment decades ago, being like, 'That's kind of rad, you are switching the norm.'"
And Thomas confirmed that he thinks Becca's sentiment was "incredible."
"Because you have someone who cares so much that they want to do that for you, like, do something that is just not done," Thomas explained.
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Thomas commended Becca on her "uncommon gesture of love, outside the ordinary."
"The amount of thought that has to go into that, not only the execution but also just the courage of having that be an idea that you want to act on, like, it's amazing," Thomas gushed.
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Thomas then looked at Becca and said, "I feel very fortunate to have been able to experience that, and I feel even more fortunate that it's with you. I'm just excited for this life."
Becca told Michelle during an early May episode of their podcast that she and Thomas had talked about getting engaged and Thomas knows he'll need her mother's permission before proposing.
Becca also teased at the time, "He knows what I want. I know what he wants, too. So who knows! I'm not all about the traditions, so we'll see."
Becca said Thomas is "very well aware" of the fact she's already had "two very public engagements" and would like a more personal or intimate one the next time around -- nothing "extravagant" and no "big scene."
Becca had her heart broken by Arie Luyendyk Jr. on The Bachelor's 22nd season in 2018, when he decided to end their engagement because he was still in love with his runner-up, Lauren Burnham, who is now his wife and the mother of his three children.
Becca also had her very public breakup with Garrett Yrigoyen, her The Bachelorette 14 winner, in 2020.
Thomas -- who previously noted how Becca wants an elongated cushion-cut diamond ring and he could see himself proposing by the end of 2022 -- recently suggested he may have already purchased a ring for Becca.
Thomas teased on an April episode of the "Click Bait with Bachelor Nation" podcast, "Am I aware if I have one in a safety lockbox in my bedroom? I don't know, time will tell. We'll have to find that one out later on this year."
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He also confirmed of the potential marriage proposal, "I don't have a full plan yet, but I know it's going to be small and intimate. There will be a camera. I'll have a photographer, but the last thing that I want for Becca is to have another grand spectacle."
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Considering Becca revealed in late May on social media that she and Thomas had been keeping their engagement a secret "for a while," it's likely the pair was already engaged when conducting their April and early May interviews.
Becca and Thomas plan to live in New York City for a few months this year and then settle down in San Diego, CA, long-term.
Thomas told Hollywood Life in November 2021 that he was pretty sold on marrying Becca because they have "the most healthy, normal relationship"
During an October episode of the "Talking It Out with Bachelor Nation" podcast, Thomas gushed of Becca, "I don't want to spend my life with anybody else... I wouldn't want to wake up next to anybody else."
On Bachelor in Paradise's seventh-season finale, Becca was shown breaking up with Thomas and crushing his heart before overnight Fantasy Suite dates because, despite having "an incredible start" to a relationship, Becca didn't want to leave The Bachelor franchise for the third time with a man unless she knew everything about him, including how he'd face adversity and real-life challenges.
However, the finale concluded with an update on Becca and Thomas' relationship, revealing how they had reunited after filming ended and were dating, "happy and in love."
During Becca and Thomas' appearance on "Talking It Out" last year, Becca revealed she's the one who tracked down Thomas' phone number and initiated their reunion.
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"After we ended things, I think I waited a couple days. I didn't have my phone right away and he didn't have his phone right away, so I think I gave it two days," Becca said.
Becca thought she'd be the last person Thomas wanted to hear from, but Thomas insisted she's the one person he had been waiting to hear from.
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Becca said she met up with Thomas in San Diego and they picked up right where they had left off, and Thomas told Hollywood Life that he had no hesitation or reservations about giving Becca another chance.
Becca also boasted about how Thomas is different from her past relationships because he's so passionate about a life with her and was prepared to fight "tooth and nail" to save their romance.
"He is so supportive and he's just funny and quirky in the cutest ways. Everything about him, I just felt safe with, unlike anything I had in the past. I was just like, 'This guy is my guy,'" Becca gushed.
Becca even told her mother last year, not long after Paradise ended, that she wanted to marry Thomas.
Despite having been engaged twice before, Becca admitted, "It's the first time I've ever actually said that out loud."
Since the pair began dating in the real world, Becca has defended Thomas and stood up for their relationship on more than one occasion considering he had been portrayed as a villain on Katie Thurston's season of The Bachelorette.
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