'The Bachelorette' alum Kaitlyn Bristowe reveals why she and Jason Tartick split up and who's at fault

The Bachelorette alum Kaitlyn Bristowe has revealed why she and Jason Tartick broke up after dating for four years and being engaged for two of those years.


"It's sad... We are both so sad," Kaitlyn, 38, began on the Tuesday, August 15 episode of her "Off the Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe" podcast, which was released a little over a week after she and Jason publicly announced their split.

"You think you're going to spend your life with somebody..."

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Kaitlyn stopped herself in her tracks because she was getting emotional. While she grabbed a tissue, she continued, "Okay we are moving on, because I don't want to sit here and cry... We're grieving a loss."


The Season 11 The Bachelorette star pointed out how she and Jason, 34, didn't put their relationship first and so they just grew apart.

"It's better to [give each other space]. Maybe in six months from now, we go, 'Yeah, this was the right move.' And maybe in six months, we go, 'You know what, I want to choose you.' But we haven't been choosing each other," Kaitlyn revealed.

"We haven't," she reiterated.

Kaitlyn went on to tell her listeners, "I do need to choose myself, and I want him to choose himself. And that's what we've been doing anyways. The right person is going to choose each other -- you're going to prioritize each other, and we just haven't been, so."

But Kaitlyn revealed that Jason is currently living in a place right "down the street" from her house in Nashville.


"I'm going to see him because we're going to share the dogs, but I can't, like, be with him in the way that I'm used to," Kaitlyn shared.

"And it's probably so confusing for people, because they're like, 'Why aren't you just together then?' Like, if people can just trust in what we're doing and where our hearts are, and be supportive [that would great]."

Kaitlyn told her podcast guest and good friend, Lo VonRumpf -- who sounded upset and apparently didn't take the news of Kaitlyn and Jason's split well -- insisted he's not going to pick a side in Kaitlyn and Jason's breakup because "there is no villain" and nobody "is at fault" for the demise of their relationship.

"No!" Kaitlyn agreed.

The Bachelor alum added how friends, family and the Internet "don't have to choose sides" in the split.


"Root for us both to be happy and grown and learn. There are no sides!" Kaitlyn pressed.

Kaitlyn said she could even imagine going out to dinner with Lo and Jason in the near future in Nashville.

"The pod is not going to die," Kaitlyn confirmed.

She elaborated, "It might take a minute [for Jason and I to heal], but I've never respected someone more through a breakup than I do with Jason."

Kaitlyn repeated how she and the "Trading Secrets" podcast host "are both so sad" about their decision to part ways.


"We both don't know what the future holds, but this is a necessary move for us right now," Kaitlyn said. "But I've never loved or respected somebody more through a breakup."

Kaitlyn also said it's "way too early" for people to ask her if she's ready to start dating again.

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Kaitlyn previously referred to her breakup from Jason as "painful" and "heartbreaking," and she took a break from social media after announcing the split in a joint Instagram posting with her ex-fiance on August 6.

Once the pair publicly confirmed their decision to end their engagement, Kaitlyn asked for prayers and privacy via Instagram Stories, and Jason called his ex a "beautiful person" whom he'll always admire.


Jason also got audibly emotional when recording the introduction to the August 7 episode of his "Trading Secrets" podcast.

Kaitlyn was then approached by TMZ at the Los Angeles International Airport on August 8, and she confirmed that her breakup from Jason was mutual and they were both doing okay. She also said they'll continue to co-parent their two beloved Golden Retriever dogs, Pino and Ramen.

Kaitlyn and Jason, who began dating in January 2019 and got engaged in May 2021, never followed through with planning a wedding, which raised eyebrows and eventually prompted breakup speculation.

Breakup rumors began to swirl in July because Kaitlyn and Jason hadn't posted anything about each other on Instagram for about a month. Jason also took a solo trip to see his mother in New York in late July, and he posted photos with his dogs during a fun day out in Nashville -- but Kaitlyn didn't participate.

And when Instagram users flooded The Bachelorette alums' comments with questions and concerns about the status of their relationship, neither Kaitlyn or Jason responded.

Kaitlyn fueled speculation her romance was on the rocks -- or over completely -- when she took to Instagram Stories on August 1 with an angry message.


"I cannot believe the audacity of people to expect things from me when I haven't even been able to process things for myself," Kaitlyn wrote, according to Us Weekly.

Needing to "process things" seemed to suggest she and Jason had split up and called off their engagement.

The former The Bachelorette co-host continued, "Have a f-cking heart. You're scaring me with your comments and demands. I'm almost worried about YOU."

Kaitlyn quickly deleted the post, but screenshots of it still exist online and in her "Off the Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe" podcast group on Facebook.

Kaitlyn subsequently uploaded a permanent post on Instagram featuring lyrics to her 2020 song "If I'm Being Honest."

Kaitlyn highlighted the following lyrics: "Just 'cause I'm an open book / Don't mean you get the whole story."


She continued, "And if I'm being honest / I'm not always as tough as I seem / And I can have my moments / But words can get the best of me / And the words that I say to myself / Are the ones that hit the hardest."

Kaitlyn had also uploaded cryptic posts on Instagram in recent weeks about self-improvement, saying she needed to "toughen up" in order to "fight the noise."

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And in mid-July, Kaitlyn suddenly got three tattoos to represent her "what is my life" era, and she was spotted without her engagement ring on a beach vacation.

While Kaitlyn and Jason breakup rumors were circulating, Kaitlyn's first fiance, her The Bachelorette 11 winner Shawn Booth, announced he's going to be a dad with a woman named Audrey "Dre" Joseph, who had taken professional and promotional photos of him and is a member at his gym.

Kaitlyn and Shawn were together for about three years and announced their split in November 2018.


Jason, who initially competed for Becca Kufrin's heart on The Bachelorette's fourteenth season in 2018, asked Kaitlyn out on their first date in January 2019, and their romance moved quickly.

Jason moved from his place in Seattle, WA, to live with Kaitlyn in Nashville, TN, in June 2019, and then the couple adopted their two dogs together. Jason then popped the question in Spring 2021.

In June 2022, Kaitlyn told Us that she and Jason planned to start trying for a baby right after their wedding. (But now that Kaitlyn and Jason are over, she confessed that she's "terrified" to have kids.)

Earlier this year, Kaitlyn explained in the media how she and Jason had been distracted when it came to wedding planning and were in no rush to exchange vows.

When asked about her nuptials on the February 5 episode of "The Most Dramatic Podcast Ever with Chris Harrison," Kaitlyn confessed with a laugh, "We suck."

"Honestly, any time we sit down to talk about [the wedding], we literally want to do something else," Kaitlyn said of her former dynamic with Jason at their home in Nashville.


"And that sounds so terrible because it should be a priority, but it doesn't feel like one -- and we're both okay with that."

Chris, who hosted The Bachelor franchise for nearly two decades, assured his friend, "That's all that matters," and Kaitlyn agreed.

"I feel like there's so much noise, like, 'Why aren't you guys talking about the wedding? Why is there not a wedding happening?!'" Kaitlyn shared.

"And it's like, 'I don't need to prove my relationship through a wedding.' I don't know, I just don't."

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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski