The Bachelorette alum Rachel Lindsay has opened up about how she's "freaking out" about a new life change and when she's going to start a family with husband Bryan Abasolo.
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"What I hope for are kids. I hope that we work less... I've actually taken a step back from work, and now I'm in a very lost transitioning phase, but I just hope that we have kids, and I hope that we're focused more [on that]," Rachel revealed to Kaitlyn Bristowe, who starred on The Bachelorette's eleventh season.
"We're working, now, for something bigger. I hope we can spend more time growing a family and [have] a little bit more stability."
Rachel admitted of having a baby, "I feel the pressure, like, I'm 38. Oh my gosh, I don't even have eggs frozen. It's just a lot!"
"And [my therapist] is telling me, as I'm in this transition phase, this is truly -- this is so scary to think about -- the first time that I've ever actually had time to be still and deal with my reality."
Rachel left her job at Extra after three years because she said she knows what she's worth and wasn't being recognized for that.
The Season 13 The Bachelorette star confessed to Kaitlyn -- who also feels pressure to have children and feels she's running out of time -- that she's "impatient" as well as a "control freak."
She continued, "I've always escaped it through work. I've never had to really worry about money. And now that my only job right now is podcasting, really, I have way more time on my hands and I'm freaking out."
But Rachel has come to realize this extra time is "a gift" and she can actually figure out what she wants and "what's next."
But Rachel may not share details about her family planning with fans because she values privacy both in her personal life and within her marriage.
"When you come off the show, you feel the pressure of showing people, 'How are we doing?' Because they want that, they fell in love with you as a couple and they want to see how you're doing and they want to check in," Rachel explained.
RELATED LINK: 'THE BACHELORETTE' COUPLES NOWShe added, "You feel like you have to perform."
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Rachel recalled grocery shopping with Bryan after their stint on The Bachelorette and having people watch their dynamic. Rachel said at one point, Bryan walked away from her and the media "blew it up into this whole thing."
"I felt anxiety to have to perform for people I don't even know, and they don't know me," Rachel shared.
"And then I'm only giving them a piece of what our relationship is, which is up and down! You go through seasons all the time and it's work. I just didn't want to do that. So very quickly, we decided, 'We're only going to share what we want to share,' and people still criticize us for that."
In fact, there were months when Rachel and Bryan didn't post anything about each other, nor did they like each other's Instagram posts.
"Everyone assumed that we were breaking up. They were counting how long it had been since we last posted about each other," Rachel lamented.
Rachel joked about how she's a "terrible" social-media person, and actually wishes that would change, because she's "losing money" because of it.
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"I am more private with my personal life, and that's why when people say, 'Are you going to do another reality show?' I don't want people to know where I live, what people I hang out with, and what I drive. I'd rather do something else -- I'd host a show!"
Rachel and Bryan got engaged on The Bachelorette's thirteenth-season finale, which aired in Summer 2017, and they tied the knot in Cancun, Mexico in August 2019.
Rachel shared in May 2022 how she and the former "Talking It Out with Bachelor Nation" podcast host had come around to the idea of expanding their family.
Rachel, a media personality and former attorney, said on Bryan's podcast at the time how she was afraid of losing everything she had built career-wise because of getting pregnant.
"There's a fear of, 'Will I lose what I started? Will people want to hire me after that?'" Rachel admitted.
Rachel confirmed that as she's getting older as a woman, she thinks about whether or not to have a baby "all the time."
"[I've considered], 'Will people look at me a certain way? Will I have the flexibility that I had before?' And it's a really scary thought," Rachel confessed.
"And I'm dealing with that right now. I'm strategically, in my mind, trying to plan out, 'When could be the best time?'"
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But Rachel acknowledged that in taking her time to do just that, she's also realized, "Hey, it may not be as easy as you thought."
She continued, "You can't be like, 'Hey, July 2022, I want to make this happen,' because it could be a lot more difficult for you," Rachel noted.
She added, "I see a lot of women who are able to do both, [work and raise a child], so I don't want to make it seem like you can't have both. It's just taking that step and actually making it happen."
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"That's all I'm going to say," she added.
And Bryan agreed with his wife in saying, "It's not easy. There's never a right time. But I think the word that should be used is 'adapting.'"
Bryan said in life, things change and people must adapt. He also insisted that he was ready to help his wife and "pick up the slack" when -- or if -- he and Rachel welcome a baby together.
"At the same time, even if I'm not ready, I've just got to be ready," Bryan shared.
"I'll be ready when it happens. That's the attitude you've got to have. I don't think anyone is ever ready for it; they just do it. And baby after baby, maybe it gets easier."
Rachel found fame when she competed on Nick Viall's season of The Bachelor and got eliminated after Fantasy Suites.
When Rachel starred on The Bachelorette, she selected Bryan over her runner-up Peter Kraus at the Final Rose Ceremony, and Bryan in turn popped the question.
After Rachel and Bryan got engaged, they lived in Rachel's hometown of Dallas, TX, for a while before moving to Miami, FL, in 2019 where Bryan continued working as a chiropractor.
Bryan gushed of his wife to Us Weekly in 2021, "Rachel just had like an X-factor [when I met her]."
"She was a triple threat -- brains, beauty, personality, great sense of humor," he added. "She was a professional. She had a career. Everything on paper was top notch... She keeps me on my toes [and] she challenges me to be a better man."
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
