'The Bachelorette' recap: Charity Lawson cuts Sean McLaughlin and Tanner Courtad, picks her Final 4 bachelors

The Bachelorette featured Charity Lawson eliminating Sean McLaughlin and Tanner Courtad, which determined her Final 4 bachelors of Season 20 during the episode that aired Monday night on ABC.


Charity denied roses to Sean, a 25-year-old software sales representative from Tampa, FL, and Tanner, a 30-year-old mortgage lender from Pittsburgh, PA, during her week in New Orleans, LA.

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Charity's Final 4 bachelors as a result are Aaron Bryant, a 29-year-old software salesman from San Diego, CA; Dotun Olubeko, a 30-year-old integrative medicine specialist from Brooklyn, NY; Joseph "Joey" Graziadei, a 27-year-old tennis pro from Koloa, HI; and Xavier Bonner, a 27-year-old biomedical scientist from Carrboro, NC.

The Bachelorette broadcast began with Charity teasing how her week ahead was going to be "very heavy," because, by the end of it, she'd have to make the difficult decision of sending two of her remaining six bachelors home.


Tanner told the cameras that he felt like he was "playing from behind" because he hadn't gotten a one-on-one date yet, and Aaron B. hoped for a solo date since he used to live in the city and he knew so much about it.

A horse-drawn carriage then pulled up for Charity and one lucky bachelor, and that man was Joey.

Tanner, who believed he had been very patient, felt "overlooked," and Sean was also upset he hadn't been asked on a one-on-one date yet.

For their date, Charity and Joey soaked in the culture of New Orleans by taking in the sights, eating local cuisine, dancing to live music, and even have their fortunes read.

Charity said she felt comfortable with Joey and he was so much fun to be around, and she also told the cameras how he has a big heart and made her feel safe. Joey, in turn, told Charity that they had something special and he always missed her when she wasn't around.


When the couple had a poem written for them on the spot based on details of their relationship, Charity said Joey had swept her off her feet and always made her smile and feel seen.

Charity called Joey's energy "infectious" and said she craved more of him when they were apart. The romantic day was "reassuring" for Charity, and she was ready to picture what their life would look like together after the show.

That night, Charity told the cameras of Joey, "This man could be my husband, and I see a forever future with him." She said they had reached a new emotional peak in their romance.

Joey told Charity that his family would welcome her with open arms but they wouldn't want to see him get hurt.

Charity shared with Joey how she had been in an interracial relationship with a man before and people would make hurtful comments about them. Charity said this man lacked awareness and was ignorant by saying things such as, "These things don't matter," when, in fact, they really do.


When asked how he felt about being in an interracial relationship, Joey said he'd have to be in that situation to understand it.

Charity also told Joey that she'd want him to educate himself about what it means for her to be a Black woman in society, and Joey seemed up to the task, even though he had never dated a Black woman before.

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Joey said his family would be "crazy" if they didn't love her but he couldn't speak on how he'd react to racism until he experiences it as Charity's teammate.

Charity got emotional during dinner and explained how the world could be overwhelming for her at times but she believes "love will triumph over everything."


Charity said her tears were happy because Joey was giving her everything she needed.

Charity therefore gave a rose to Joey, and she assured him that she didn't take his affection and care for her for granted. Charity wanted to meet his family, and he happily accepted the rose.

"I can see a finish line with her... I have to tell her how I feel or else I'll always regret it," Joey said in a confessional.

Joey proceeded to tell Charity that he was "falling in love" with her, and Charity replied, "Thank you."

Charity said she was also falling in love with Joey, but she didn't tell him that to his face.


Meanwhile, a Date Card arrived for Sean and Tanner -- a dreaded two-on-one date. Sean said he was "confused, upset, bummed and pissed." He didn't know how to navigate this or how to react to the bad news. Sean felt he had put his heart on the line, so he was very disappointed.

Tanner said Charity "could be the One" for him, and so he planned to show up for The Bachelorette star. Sean also said he could see a future with Charity and he "never felt so strongly" for a girl. The last time he felt this way, Sean said he fell in love.

"I'm going to win," Sean insisted. "I'm not going to let a silly two-on-one date get in the way of my end goal."

For their awkward date, Charity took the two men to the bayou for an airboat ride through swampy waters, where they saw alligators and more.

Charity was trying to figure out who could be a boyfriend vs. a husband. She thought Sean was sweet and thoughtful, but she wondered if that was enough. And Charity had been holding out hope for Tanner, whom she wanted things to work out with. Charity, however, needed Tanner to open up to her more.

Sean was more vocal than Tanner on the date and the pair was noticeably building momentum, which worried Tanner and made him realize that he needed to step up his game.


The trio then enjoyed a crawfish feast at a picnic table, and the day portion of the date ended with Charity and Sean making out with Tanner nearby (with his head turned away).

At dinner that evening, Charity was afraid of sending the wrong person home. She asked to speak to Sean first, and she acknowledged how their time together had not been maximized.

Sean told Charity that he was willing to get his heart crushed in the end for her and that his family was going to adore her. Sean said he wanted to recreate that sunset moment in Oceanside with Charity every single day.

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Charity then talked to Tanner, who confessed he had his guard up. Tanner was previously in a serious relationship for three years, and he claimed that after one fight, the woman flew to Florida, never came back and ghosted him. Tanner said he had walls up ever since but those walls weren't going to stay up forever.

Meanwhile, Aaron B. lamented about how he was holding onto something that happened with Charity four weeks ago, which he said felt like six months at this point.


A Date Card then arrived for Dotun, with Charity asking him to meet her at sunrise. Aaron B. vented about how he was "pissed" not to have received a one-on-one date in New Orleans.

Back on Charity's two-on-one date, she told the cameras she was getting "a stress rash" because she didn't know what to do.

Charity told the two men, "This rose not only symbolizes where I feel I'm at with our connection, but it symbolizes the importance of what next week holds. I feel the best decision for me, at this moment, is to not hand out a rose tonight. But I'm so grateful. I'm grateful for the both of you."

Tanner was glad that Charity respected him enough to give him more time, but Sean was visibly frustrated and upset.

"I don't know how you can be happy in this moment, like, I am not happy!" Sean confessed. "I don't know what this looks like for us... Now I'm questioning everything. How can I be so sure about something and still have this girl so unsure about us?"

Sean said he needed the validation of a rose on his chest before hometowns, and so he didn't know what to think. He was feeling very insecure about their relationship, which was less than desirable given his family was about to be involved.


The next morning, Charity and Dotun participated in the Crescent City Classic.

Since Charity doesn't run, she and the bachelor dressed up in crazy costumes and playfully ran with a big group after dancing in the streets and goofing around. They stopped to drink beer and chat with locals, and Charity loved Dotun's enthusiasm and how interactive he was with others.

Once Charity and Dotun crossed the finish line, she hopped into his arms and they kissed. The couple felt a natural connection, and Dotun loved the real-world feel of their date in NOLA.

Dotun was on Cloud 9 and prepared himself to tell Charity how he was feeling about her that night. He just hoped that she was feeling the same way.

The couple's date continued into the evening, and Dotun gushed about how he had never experienced feelings like this before for a woman.

Dotun told Charity that he was so excited for his family to meet her but he found the whole thing "scary as hell."


Dotun admitted he has a fear of failure because every time he really wanted or went for something, he wouldn't get it and would fall flat on his face.

Charity agreed that she was terrified because it felt so real and right with Dotun, which was something they both deserved. But Charity suggested that she worried if something was missing or if the other shoe was going to drop.

"Is there something i should be doubting? Should I be doubting myself? But no, this is exactly what I prayed for and truly opened my heart up to receive," Charity shared.

Dotun said sometimes a good thing is just a good thing -- and they should just let it be that. Dotun assured Charity that his heart was in the process and she had "taken it already."

"My heart is screaming that I'm definitely falling in love with you at this point," Dotun told The Bachelorette star, adding how it was "very real" to him.

Charity said that's what she needed to hear, and she told the cameras that she felt "overjoyed" and "over the moon." Charity then gave Dotun a rose, and he said he couldn't have asked for a better person to do this journey with.


Charity said Dotun could be the man with whom she navigates this life with, and she cried at the end of their date.

Dotun told the cameras that the heart wants what it wants and his connection with Charity was so strong.

Meanwhile, a Date Card arrived for Aaron B., Xavier, Tanner and Sean.

Sean assumed there were going to be two roses for four people, if Dotun returned home with a rose on his chest.

Dotun then showed up at the men's hotel suite with a rose pinned to his lapel. While Dotun shared details of his date, Sean walked out of the room. Sean wondered if he was feeling things for Charity that she was not.

Xavier pointed out that Sean liked Charity a lot and so he might just do something crazy.


And Xavier was right. Sean felt he deserved some answers since he already viewed Charity as his future wife and the mother of his children, and so he knocked on Charity's hotel door.

Sean explained to Charity how he never got a one-on-one date and had only received roses at Rose Ceremonies. Charity said she didn't want to hand out a rose unless she felt truly confident in it. She didn't want to do a disservice to herself or the guys.

Sean told Charity that it meant so much to him to bring a woman home to meet his family, as he had only brought one woman home before.

Sean said he felt passionate about them as a couple and was "in the process of falling in love" with her, which is why that two-on-one date rose had meant so much to him.

Charity confessed to Sean that she had stronger connections with other men, but Sean suggested they could've caught up with more one-on-one time.

"I don't want you to give up... because I think this is something we should explore further," Sean said. "With more one-on-one time, we could get there.


Charity, however, disagreed. Charity said she could go on and on about how wonderful he is but she couldn't give Sean what he wanted from her. Charity told Sean that she didn't think she could get there with him, and that really scared her.

The news clearly wasn't what Sean wanted to hear, and she apologized in tears for dumping him.

When the pair hugged goodbye, Sean appeared to burst into tears.

"I feel heartbroken. I feel crushed. I feel confused. Dude, I don't get it," Sean said in his final words.

"I tried everything I could have to express how I felt and why I felt that way, and it just wasn't enough. I'm walking away from here with such incredible feelings for this girl. What happened? I saw a future with her. Oh my god!"

The next day, Charity embarked on her last date in New Orleans with three guys. She said they were all strong and she couldn't predict what was going to happen. This decision was weighing on her heavily, and Charity called these two roses "transformative."


Charity then talked with each man, one at a time. Aaron B. said it was one of the hardest weeks of his life -- watching men return from dates with a "post-Charity glow" -- but his memories with Charity got him through it.

Tanner admitted having his hometown date be his first one-on-one date with Charity was scary, but at the same time, he said he was ready to introduce The Bachelorette star to his family.

And then Xavier didn't want to leave Charity with any questions about who he is. Charity gushed about their chemistry, and Xavier shared how the idea of committing himself to one person forever scared him.

"That scares me because it's something I've never done before, and I want to do it once and I want to do it right. There has to be no doubt there," Xavier explained to the Bachelorette.

"I know I want to get engaged and I know I want to get married; it's a question of is that you?... I'm trying to gain any sense of clarity. I don't know what that thing is that's going to make me fall in love. It's just going to happen."

But Xavier assured Charity that he thought he could get there with her.


"If you're The One, I don't want to pass that up. But previously, it's scared the f-ck out of me," he concluded.

A big part of Xavier believed that Charity could be The One for him.

After a heavy week, Charity decided to give a rose to Aaron B., and he was absolutely thrilled.

Charity told her remaining two men that this was the hardest decision she ever had to make. She felt totally "torn" and questioned if she was going to make the right choice.

Charity therefore asked the two guys to attend a Rose Ceremony that night.

However, before the Rose Ceremony, Charity visited Tanner in his hotel room. Charity thanked Tanner for being so open and honest with her, but then she broke up with him. Charity said meeting his family so early into their relationship wouldn't be fair and it wouldn't make sense for them to get engaged in a few short weeks.


Charity cried as she let Tanner down, but he kept comforting her and assuring her that everything was okay.

"We gave this everything we got, and I think that's what hurts the most. It sucks because she felt the same way I felt. I know that," Tanner said in his final words.

"She's just got such a big heart, so that's why I was trying to be as strong as possible. I didn't want her to know how much it hurt me. I know it was really hard on her, and it's hard on me too. I said it once and I'll say it every day -- that girl deserves the world. She's something really special."

Charity proceeded to give Xavier a rose, saying that she was following her heart and doing what felt best. She said she didn't have to hand the rose out but it was something that she wanted to do.

"I want to meet your family... There's so much more I want to learn," Charity said.

Xavier gushed about how this rose meant everything to him and he hoped that he could fall in love.


Charity told the cameras what she and Xavier had was special and she felt something strong for him.

"Time will only tell if my decision is the right decision," Charity concluded.

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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski