Average Joe 4 - Episode 5 Summary

'Kissing Anna' By Seana

Welcome to the second to last episode of Average Joe. Last week, a bunch of stuff happened, and SilverStar told you all about it here.

This week, the final four will be heading to Tahiti with Anna. But wait! What about our madeover Joes? We certainly can’t leave without them! So, we hear the Six Million Dollar Man music (hopefully for the last time – that got old fast, I tell you) while watching snippets of the makeovers, some more extreme than others. In particular, Nick got some liposuction. Liposuction makes me squeamish when I watch it. I mean, lookit what they’re doing: ramming a vacuum into his face. Ew.

And here are the opening credits. How long did it take to get to the beginning?

So we are in a limo with Anna, Rocky, HunkJosh, AverageJosh and Arthur. They are wondering why it’s taking so long to get to the airport. The limo driver pulls up to the place with the fountains that we’ve seen a million times in the precaps and Anna gets out. She is no dummy and knows that since she was told to look at the fountain, that there will be something on the other side. Of course, we know it will be the madeover Joes making their dramatic comebacks. Go Joes!

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Cut to the limo: Arthur sees someone wearing a suit. All the boys are straining to see what they can. They think he looks familiar. Anna is perplexed. He’s walking up. Oh, the anticipation! Cut to Anna and the fountains. The water drops abruptly and all we have is a man walking calmly and confidently towards Anna. He is accompanied by not-quite-porno music. It’s AverageOtherJosh! “Jesus has been resurrected as a GQ model,” says Arthur, getting a giggle from me. Much to her credit, Anna eventually recognizes him and remembers his name. Good for her. She says he’s hot.

The fountain springs back to life. Who will be next? One of *her* old guys? Or someone else?

And it’s Nathan! He’s looking dapper in his suit and tie. His music is kind of a dum-dum-dum-dum bass thing. Nathan feels more confident now. He walks to the place where the Joes have been told to walk to after they see Anna.

“The Fountains of Fate once again spout.” Arthur amuses me.

It’s Nick! He gets the porno music too. He also strides confidently towards Anna. As with the Joes before him, shots of Nick first getting off the bus are shown, as well as a couple confessional interview shots, for the full before-and-after effect. Although, I don't see a big difference with Nick.

Arthur says that maybe if he gets plastic surgery to fix his bags, he’ll be more of a catch.

Fountains up.

Last but not least, here’s Dante. He gets Superman-like music. Everyone seems pretty happy to see him – Anna, the guys in the limo. Anna says that for some reason, she saw Dante and just cried. Clearly the makeover crew didn’t address his foot odour problem. He says that he would do anything for a second chance with Anna.

Anna thinks that it is great that the guys have been given a chance to change, not just for her, but for themselves. Dammit. More points for Anna. Pfft. She actually seems like a nice girl. I believe that she cares. The chick is supposed to be a superficial floozy and Anna just isn’t. I really dislike her for that.

Of the four, I think Nathan and AverageMessiahJosh look the most different.

Now we are all over by the limo. Anna must choose one of these four madeover Joes to accompany her and the guys in the limo to Tahiti. Who will it be? OK, not fond of this concept. You’ve been rejected once. How about being rejected twice? Whee!

Arthur is trying to listen by putting a glass up to the window. He says that trick doesn’t work. Arthur is getting the Make Seana *snort* edit this episode.

Anna chooses Nathan, who walks forward, smiling with his new teeth. Dante, being a good guy, gives Nathan a pat on the back.

***

Oh look, it’s Tahiti. Purty. Anna will go on a private date with each guy.

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