Welcome to DAW TV. Greeneyes, here, reporting from France. Tonight we are going to do a behind the scenes look at the filming of The Bachelor. Many things happen at production meeting and behind the scenes to put shows like this on the air. Stay tuned, after the break, we’ll take a close look at Executive Producer, Mike Fleiss and his crew in action.
[Commercial Break]
Production Meeting (author’s note: These are real names of people on the production crew)
Mike: All right gang, how is the taping going so far with Travis and the girls? I sure hope it’s good stuff, we really have got to get some adrenaline pumping in to this show so that we don’t get cancelled completely.
Jason: Well, Travis’ friends, Matt and Kevin, interviewed the girls. They picked the one to go on the Paris date with Travis. During the meetings, they tested the girls on their medical knowledge.
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Rebecca: It was quite funny really. One of the girls said that the tongue was the biggest muscle in the body. Another said it is the intestines. Susan, finally, got it right, saying it is the butt.
Lisa: My favorite part was when Kevin and Matt pulled out the diamond rings, with different size stones, to see which one each lady liked. Of course, they were doing it to test for materialism, since Travis is a doctor and all. They don't want the girls to only be about money. Well, they really did accomplish what they set out to do. We knew Moana would not disappoint us, and she immediately went for the biggest rock. I loved her line, “I’m as shallow as a kiddie pool.” Tara was as insipid as always. She thought she would try to sound good by saying she liked the largest one, not because of the size, but that it looked the most romantic. Yeah, like anyone thinks she actually she believes what she is saying.
Donny: The next part of the meeting with Kevin and Matt was a talent competition. I didn’t have the heart to tell them that ABC dropped Miss America, so we let them do it anyway. The girls were just weird. Nashville Sarah put her fist in her mouth. Not attractive, but I do wish she would do that more often, so that we don’t have to hear her whining all the time. But the lamest had to be Jennifer. She is a swimsuit model, so she did some modeling poses in her bikini as her talent.
Rebecca: Anyway. Kevin and Matt picked Susan for the single date. We sent them off to Paris. We gave them maps to get there. It was pouring rain, they got lost on some winding country roads, and had to try to get directions from the locals, half of which could not figure out Travis’s horrible attempts at speaking French . But the best part was seeing Travis, who is so tall, try to squeeze in to a car that looks like it should have belonged to Steve Urkel. What happened to the budget for this date? Why didn't we give him a decent car? Oh yeah, we wanted to test Susan, to see if she would complain. Surprisingly, she didn't say a word when they were totally lost and only saw some cows along the road.
Jason: I can’t believe it took them three hours to get to Paris. Oh well, at least we finally got to see Travis kiss one of them. I didn’t think that would ever happen, he moves at about the speed of a snail, which coincidentally, he ate for dinner that night. Now, I’m beginning to get the connection. Anyway, after dinner, he gave Susan a rose, asking her to stay. They went to a hotel balcony to look at the lights, and started making out. It’s about time we some action going, everyone was thinking he was a cold fish or something.
Lisa: The other girls really don’t like Susan. They think that she is faking her feelings for Travis because she wants to be an actress. I didn’t realize that being in love and being an actress are mutually exclusive, but according to both Sarahs it is. They also don’t like Moana. They all think she is taking up a space because she’s really not interested in him, and another girl should be there in the final 8. Actually, I like that she is not proclaiming her love after a couple of days. She’s unique, and it’s causing some tension in the house, because she’s still there. It’ll make for some good scenes and catfights when it all comes to a head with Moana and the others.
[End of meeting]
Greeneyes’s Voiceover: Wow! Sounds like some things are heating up with the last 8 girls. Can’t wait to see what will happen next. We’ll be right back to hear what some of the girls think after the big group date.
[Commercial Break]
At the Bachelorette’s Chateau (after the 2nd date)
Jehan: I can’t believe the five of us (Moana, Shiloh, Tara, Nashville, and me) got to go to the Riviera with Travis. It was simply amazing and beautiful. I’m still keeping my eye on the prize. He is soooo great. I just wonder how he’ll react to my secret that I’ll reveal next week.
Canada Sarah: Who cares about your secret? I’m still ticked that he didn’t save the first kiss for me. I really thought we had this fabulous connection. But he goes off and kisses another girl, how dare he kiss some wannabe actress instead of me first. I’m so disappointed!
Nashville: Moana is such a beeyotch! I can’t believe he cuddled with Moana on the yacht and gave her a rose. I’m just jealous though because I didn’t think of taking him coffee first thing in the morning. She is just evil, were all here for the same guy, and she tries to spend time with him alone. I mean, how can she not know how she feels about him yet? I know she’s hardly spent any time with him, and it’s only been a few days, but she should be in love with him, just like me. Also, I really think Tara is horrible also. She always interrupts, in her drunken slur. If Travis is away from the group with another girl, Tara will find them, she’s like a blood hound. How rude of her! She broke into our alone time just so she could get in the hot tub. But we showed her, we left the deck, and went elsewhere when the others came upstairs. She is so pushy. I can’t believe she asked him who was getting the rose on this date. Oh, Travis just makes me swoon. We have so much in common, after all, we are both in Nashville, what more could he want? I can't wait until he drops everyone else and proposes to me!
Shiloh: Well, Nashville, I tried to help your cause. I warned him that there are girls here for the wrong reason. I’m sure he’s glad to know that, and he will listen to my advice.
[End of chateau scene]
Greeneyes’s Voiceover: Hostility seems to be brewing at the chateau. Can’t wait to see what happens in the next few weeks. Stay tuned to hear Travis thoughts on his last date before the Rose Ceremony
[Commercial Break]
Travis Confessional (during the 3rd date)
Travis: I’m so glad that we got to go camping for one date. It’s awesome! Canada is just great to hang out with. I’m so going to make out with Canada once I give her the rose and send Jennifer home. Jennifer is cute and all, but she’s too pampered. She has never been camping before in her life. She just about flipped out when we went into the tent to talk, there were tons of bugs in there, and she was scared to death of them. She was also trying way too hard! Puhhhhleeese! She thinks it’s wonderful how we don’t like any of the same hobbies, and that’s a compliment to each other’s personalities, so that we can learn from each other. Whatever! But there is just no spark there. Canada is just so cute though, and that stoner voice of hers just gets to me. Hey producers, how long ‘til I can dump Jen, and jump on Canada in her sleeping bag?
[End of date coverage]
Greeneyes’s Voiceover: Well, I guess Sarah finally got her wish to kiss Travis, and not the little bunny kiss she got last week. Up next, see which girl goes home.
[Commercial Break]
Rose Ceremony
Most of the girls are wearing black and are split into two groups.
Group one, sitting in chairs, already have roses:
• Susan, showing way too much cleavage • Canada, with an 80’s punk rock hair do, not helping herself get rid of the stoner image • Moana, looks very nice
Group two, standing, waiting for roses:
Jehan, Tara, and Nashville all get roses. Shiloh got sent home, she hugged Travis, and gave one last parting shot to him to warn him against Moana.
[End of The Bachelor episode]
Greeneyes’s Voiceover: Thank you for joining us for this edition of DAW TV. Just a few more episodes of The Bachelor before we know who Travis chooses to receive the final rose. Who will it be? Will he propose or pull a Jesse and give her a plane ticket? Will they stay together? Keep watching as these and many more questions will be answered during the rest of the season.