Road Rules: South Pacific - Episode 12 Summary

'Over the Hills and Through the Muck, To Whinefest We Go' By BlackSheep

Previously on RR – The Roadies meet their Cara replacement and are sent onto a 3 day frontier mission where they soon discover that their new Roadie Tina is a lot like the old Cara.

Are we really sure Tina is not a reincarnation of Cara? After last weeks mission, Tina phones her mother to begin b!tching and moaning about being miserable (sound familiar), and how her manicure and pedicure are a disaster. We keep being reminded that Tina’s mother lives in a trailer so the jump to the RV should be homey at least, though not by Tina’s standards, when she states “I don’t need filth to open my eyes”. Or maybe that excerpt was a referral to Donell. Who really knows anyhow.

Tina proclaims that the tendency to switch to “Tina the B!tch” is there, look out when the ghetto princess sharpens those nails somebody might catch a case of cat scratch fever! Though she also acknowledges to her mother that she knows she has been blessed and is grateful and is going to take advantage of this opportunity.

Next we see Donell has captured Tina and begins spewing his venomous hatred for this new target, Mary-Beth and her fake tatas. I guess Abe is still in memory and figures it’ll be easier to pick on a girl this time around. Donell tells Tina “me & Mary-Beth have a love/hate relationship she knows it too. I can’t stand her, I just can’t stand her” Tina asks “Why?” Donell replies “Like, I know you’re not fake, you’ll tell me to shut the $%*! Up. You’ll tell me how you feel, Mary-Beth is like, she’s fake as the %*$@*!? On her chest” Tina’s “Oh Lord!”

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Donell feels that he doesn’t know what the real Mary-Beth is, he feels like she is a phony person. Tina thinks that Donell and her have a lot of similarities, stating they’re both “very real”. After talking with Donell, in Tina’s confessional she states that she doesn’t trust Mary-Beth 100%, doesn’t want to know her and doesn’t want to spend the time to get to know her either.
I guess that being “very real” means, very real in judging people and not willing to get to understand someone outside of your preset “similarities”.

Back inside the RV the team huddles around as Christina announces their next mission go to Ness Park (sp?) at 12pm for your next mission. The team speculates that this will be a mental task over a physical task, being that the mission is tomorrow and they just finished their last task today! Chris is hoping so, because everyone is a little drained from the frontier mission, and this is going to be a test of stamina and a mental challenge for everyone to step it up.

The team all lounging outside the RV for their evening of bootylicious conversation provided by Tina, get to see their X-rated new girl in her ‘real’ personality, loud (even Christina pegged her right when she said that Tina is a lot like Cara except ghetto), aggressive ‘I’ll steal your man if I want because I’m sexually frustrated with 2 hot guys living with me'. Now I see why RR brought Tina on, we were lacking sex this season. Although Tina does say that Dave is not her type and is doing it just to get at Mary-Beth, doesn’t dissuade her from making sexual innuendos at him, and being the good non-confrontational guy Dave is, he plays along. All the while, Mary-Beth conceals her irritation because she knows Dave is HER man, so she diligently works at picking a lock? (which is a padlock attached to nothing btw) Is there some foreshadowing here??

Btw, 2 hot guys, what about Donell? Oh that’s right we’ll get to him later!

On the road to Queenstown

Mission: 1 hour to complete a 3 mile course – the catch is that 4 members will not be able to see, while the other 2 cannot speak or hear.

Donell immediately insists rather starts flipping out that he will NOT be blindfolded – guess he is still afraid of the dark – poor baby. Cued perfectly, Christina confessional states that “we all cater to what Donell needs, if he’s not comfortable we can lose any mission”. Boy, isn’t he a team player. I would have loved to see Donell blindfolded on this mission – the Pillsbury doughboy rolling down the hill! Would have been some great LOL moments.

Regardless, it is a miracle, finally, for at least a small segment of this episode Donell will have his mouth taped shut – I must be in heaven!

Anyhow the team has 5 minutes to figure out what they are going to do, Mary-Beth and Donell are the visual aids, Christina, Chris, Tina and Dave are blind, but they can hear and speak. They work out a clapping system for turning and stopping.

And the race begins, the terrain itself is hazardous, hilly uneven grasslands, muck and yucking stuff and even a stagnant pool of water that the local sheep use as a watering hole. All the blind mice are falling all over the place, tripping, slipping, it's alot to LOL at.

Tina being the freak out PRINCESS she is, cannot stop screaming every time she falls, or moderately hurts herself. Causing for a lot of confusion in the team being that the blind only hear her big mouth.
Chris’ confessional in regard to this was comical, “every time she falls, it’s oh my goodness, I cut my knee, I’m gonna die, I need a pedicure/manicure. She’s making it very hard for anyone to concentrate to what’s going on.” As she stumbles does a hillside! Priceless.

Donell is becoming extremely irritable because no one is paying any attention to him – the mighty chieftain gets no respect!

We’ve reached the halfway point, which took them 39+ minutes to get halfway. They’ll have 20:40 to return the same way they came, but they better do it in double time or they will FAIL THE MISSION!!!

During the 5 minute rest break, Donell immediately begins his temper tantrum running and screaming like a 2 yr old, no one f’in focused, no one’s doing what I want, waa waa waa. At this point I give props to the rest of the team, they essentially tell Donell to shut the hell up, and his little boo hoo hoo isn’t going to help matters. Chris tells Tina that she needs to stop b!tching every time she falls because it’s distracting and take the bumps and bruises get back up and keep on going. And also states that their are too many chiefs and not enough indians.

Round 2 begins, the 4 blind mice get snarled on a barbed wire fence, where Donell says that if they just went a little further the opening was right there. Well Donell, since you are their eyes, why weren’t you trying to get them to find it rather than just be the bump on the log that complains about everything? Nonetheless, the roadies are making good progress, Tina falls but doesn’t complain, she’s being a team player to try to finish.

At the top of the Finish line the clock is running and we can see the roadies within sight, they’re down to 4 minutes – plenty of time right? Sure except they all get panicked and go in different directions! After being stuck in trees/shrubs, scraping and crawling up the hill they all make it to the finish line – but wait, did they make it in time? The team is a little stressed uncertainty covers their faces – did they make it or did they fail their mission and have to airmail someone home - Christina doesn't want to think about it.

The official clock says 1:21 left, the roadies made it in the nick of time, they are elated and overjoyed especially that no one is being sent home express style. They are given their next piece of the tattoo.

Back at the RV, they put up the next piece on their RV, Mary-Beth can’t believe how fast it’s filling up, yep that’s right, the ride is almost over. And the roadies get a message, they are going to TAHITI!!! Tina is overcome with tears, while claiming that she doesn’t cry but just can’t help it because when she goes on vacation is on a couple hundred bucks and someplace close. Then we get the shot of Tina and Donell with arms around each other, happy to be friends, and Tina says, “I’m the luckiest girl in the world” and then Donell chimes in “I think I’m the luckiest girl in the world”

You figure that one out!

Oh, almost forgot my foreshadowing spot. On next weeks RR mission, there is something to do with picking the lock to these boxes that they have to find. Hmmm. Also Mary-Beth is on a date with the same guy that Tina was with the night before – will tensions between the roadies heat up, and what about Dave? Maybe he’s been left for the cold showers.

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