So You Think You Can Dance judge Allison Holker has revealed that she believed late husband Stephen "tWitch" Boss was with her during Season 18, which just wrapped on Fox.

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"I just feel like every single day -- [on the] show and not [on the] show -- I just feel him putting wings on my back," Allison, 36, told Us Weekly on Wednesday, May 22.

"I just feel so much support from him, and I'm really grateful for that because I think some people might see that kind of energy and be a little bit scared of it. But it's so beautiful and I feel like he protects me day in and day out."

TWitch, who had served as a So You Think You Can Dance judge during Season 15 and Season 17, tragically died by suicide in December 2022 when he was 40-years-old.

TWitch and Allison had met when they were both contestants on Season 7 of So You Think You Can Dance in 2010.

The pair got married in 2013 and welcomed two children together: son Maddox, 8, and daughter Zaia, 4. TWitch also adopted Allison's daughter Weslie, who is now 15-years-old, from a previous relationship.

Allison shared how returning to So You Think You Can Dance felt like "a full circle moment" for her.

"It feels like this show is the gift that keeps on giving to me. It seems to reach out to me and find me in moments that I didn't even know I needed it. It found me when I was 18 years old. I was still in high school. I had bad eyebrows," Allison quipped.

"It gave me love, it gave me opportunity, it gave me career, it gave me friendships and it gave me kids, so the show has just been everything to me."

And once she became a judge, Allison said that felt like a gift as well.

The former Dancing with the Stars pro added, "It reached out to me at a time when I was really scared to get back into work."

But Allison said being a part of the show -- and being able to witness all that talent -- made her feel like she was honoring or paying tribute to tWitch.

"Every time I was on the show, seeing the other dancers [and] hearing people's stories, I just knew I'm where I'm supposed to be in honor of myself and my personal journey, but also his journey and his personal journey and the journey that brought us together," Allison gushed.

"It feels like this is the space I'm supposed to be in and I know he's with me every single day."

After Anthony Curley was crowned the So You Think You Can Dance winner of Season 18, Allison threw a finale party for friends and cast members.

"Anthony is wonderful. Stephen would have absolutely adored Anthony," Allison noted.

Fellow So You Think You Can Dance judge Maksim Chmerkovskiy attended the celebration with his pregnant wife, Dancing with the Stars pro Peta Murgatroyd. The spouses already share sons Shai, 7, and Rio, 23 months.

"I think the most memorable thing for me was getting to have this incredible relationship with Maks and [fellow judge] JoJo [Siwa], sitting at the panel with them," Allison told Us. "Maks kind of became like my older brother."

Allison suggested she's extremely thankful for her life, even when she's feeling "low" or "discouraged."

Allison shared, "Life is so beautiful and there's so much to do and experience and you can't have all the beautiful without also having a negative side of life. The people that live the most vibrant lives have experienced so much pain."

"So as much as I've experienced," she added. "I try my best to look at it as a gratitude [that] I've been able to live so much."

TWitch was found dead on December 13 in a Los Angeles motel, the Oak Tree Inn in Encino, CA -- which was less than one mile from his house -- from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

According to the Los Angeles County Medical Examiner, tWitch died by suicide and there were "no signs of foul play," Us reported at the time.

Allison and tWitch had celebrated their ninth wedding anniversary just a few days before tWitch took his own life, and Allison always gushed about how tWitch was a great father and spouse.

In early March, Allison praised her kids for being so strong after losing their beloved father.

"My loves we are stronger than you could ever imagine. And we will stand strong together as a unit, and find the courage to hold each other up. I will be here for you every step of the way through the highs and lows, the ups and the downs," Allison captioned a family photo on Instagram.

"I will protect and I will guide, I will be a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, I will have mom jokes ready for when you need a good laugh. The love and light inside our hearts will still shine. I love you forever and always. Mommy."

And not long after tWitch's passing, Allison penned a sweet message to her longtime love in early January on Instagram.

"To my husband, best friend, babe, Chee-chalker, Superman and father of my children I LOVE YOU FOREVER and ALWAYS!" Allison wrote at the time, sharing a slideshow of pictures from the couple's 2013 engagement and wedding.

"We will forever remember you as the true beacon of light that you were and we will continue to cast your light and love throughout the world. Thank you for our incredible memories and our beautiful life shared together."

When tWitch's tragic passing first made headlines, Allison confirmed his death in a statement without revealing any details.

"It is with the heaviest of hearts that I have to share my husband Stephen has left us," Allison said late last year.

"Stephen lit up every room he stepped into. He valued family, friends and community above all else and leading with love and light was everything to him. He was the backbone of our family, the best husband and father, and an inspiration to his fans."

She continued, "To say he left a legacy would be an understatement, and his positive impact will continue to be felt. I am certain there won't be a day that goes by that we won't honor his memory."

"We ask for privacy during this difficult time for myself and especially for our three children. Stephen, we love you, we miss you, and I will always save the last dance for you," she concluded.

Allison and tWitch got engaged in June 2013.

Married by So You Think You Can Dance co-executive producer Jeff Thacker, Allison and tWitch exchanged vows at SYTYCD creator and former judge Nigel Lythgoe's vineyard and winery in Paso Robles, CA, in December 2013.

Maddox was then born in March 2016, and Allison later gave birth to Zaia in November 2019.

TWitch rose to fame as a contestant Season 4 of So You Think You Can Dance in 2008, when he finished as the runner-up.

Allison and tWitch were also All-Star dancers on Season 7 of So You Think You Can Dance in 2010, when the pair connected romantically.

TWitch returned to So You Think You Can Dance as a member of its judging panel for Season 15, which aired on Fox in 2018, and then again for Season 17, which aired in Summer 2022.

TWitch was also a semifinalist on MTV's The Wade Robson Project in 2003 as well as the runner-up on Star Search.

For her part, Allison competed as a pro partner on Seasons 19, 20, 21, and 23 of Dancing with the Stars. The highest she ever placed was second with Riker Lynch on Season 20.
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski

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