The Real Gilligan's Island 2 - Episodes 7 & 8 Summary

'Where’s Bob Denver When You Need Him?' By Scuba Steve

We start the show with Shawn in the shower and Tiy-E pedaling. Tiy-E realizes that Shawn is shaving his chest hair. Why is he doing this? Shawn says it’s, “to become more aerodynamic.” I don’t know if shaving chest hair makes you aerodynamic, but it definitely makes you look stupid, Shawn.

We then get more stuff with Shawn and Tiy-E. Crazy Charlie c-ts: “Shawn and Tiy-E have really bonded.” Bonding, huh? So, that’s what they’re calling it now.

Shawn and Tiy-E talk to Erika to get her on their side, but she isn’t buying it. Erika c-ts: “I don’t want to have an alliance with anyone.” Okay, Erika. You have zero chance of winning.

Erika heads down to the beach with Crazy Charlie. She tells him that he is safe if he goes with her like how Miss Melissa was safe with her. Wait a minute, she voted Miss Melissa out. Don’t trust her, Charlie.

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HostGuy comes on the radio, and it’s time for the final reward competition. There are two prizes. One can only be won by one person, and that is a plate of the castaway’s favorite food. Crazy Charlie has nachos. Randi has steak and potatoes. Shawn has buffalo wings and fries. Erika has a bacon cheeseburger and fries. Tiy-E has macaroni & cheese with fries. Mac & cheese with fries? Who the hell puts those two together?

In addition, the castaways could also win videos from home. To win the rewards, they must scour the beach for gold nuggets and place them on a scale or in their individual chest. If the nuggets weigh more than the videos, they win them. Also, the castaway who has more nuggets in their individual chest wins their meal.

The competition starts. Most of the castaways are after the videos, but Randi and Crazy Charlie are after the food. Randi is after it because she is very hungry. Crazy Charlie wants it because, “No one knows I’m here, so I have nothing to worry about but the belly.” I don’t think you need to worry about that, Charlie.

In the end, the castaways had enough nuggets to win the videos, while Charlie beat Randi for the meal, which makes Shawn very happy.

The castaways return to their huts. Almost immediately, Shawn and Tiy-E complain nonstop about Randi and Crazy Charlie going after the food. They keep saying how they only cared about themselves, but they would have done the same thing if they were that hungry.

Crazy Charlie starts eating his nachos while the other castaways look on with their mouths wide open. Charlie teases them by eating very slowly. They start discussing the videos when Charlie starts going into a story about his life. Ten years later, he finishes. Some of the castaways have a newfound respect for him, but Shawn thinks it’s a load of bull. Trust me, Shawn knows if something if a load of bull.

The castaways settle down and watch the videos. Shawn is up first, and his family is on there including his mother who is dressed in the Gilligan costume. The sad thing is she makes a better Gilligan than Shawn.

Randi, Tiy-E, and Erika view their videos and cry a bunch. Finally, Crazy Charlie’s video comes on. Suprisingly, they actually found people who know Crazy Charlie. How, I don’t know, and I probably don’t want to.

Skipping ahead a bit, it’s time for the safety competition. HostGuy explains when they get to the lagoon. There are several objects hidden in the water. HostGuy will call out one of those objects, and the castaways will dive in and find it. The catch is that there is only a certain number of a given item which means one castaway will be eliminated in each round. Because Tiy-E can’t swim to save his life, he must wear a life jacket.

The first object is a pineapple. Tiy-E flounders about in the water when his life jacket comes undone. The other castaways find the pineapple, and Tiy-E is eliminated.

The second object is a raft. Crazy Charlie and Randi find it easily. That leaves Shawn and Erika to fight it out. Shawn runs out of gas, and Erika finds the raft and eliminates him. Third object is a tiki. Crazy Charlie and Randi again find it easily and eliminate Erika.

The final object is the SS Minnow. It’s a close race, but Crazy Charlie overtakes Randi and is safe from the next vote.

The castaways head to the huts, and Crazy Charlie gloats about how he is safe. Randi also feels confident because she has Erika on her side. She goes to take a nap. As soon as she fall asleep, Shawn and Tiy-E try to sway Charlie and Erika to vote Randi out.

It’s now time for Voodoo Village.

Votes are as follows:

Crazy Charlie not shown
Shawn votes for Randi
Tiy-E votes for Randi
Erika not shown
Randi votes for Tiy-E

HostGuy reveals the votes, and Randi is out unanimously. She starts crying uncontrollably, and I’m jumping for joy.

The castaways head back to the huts. Shawn starts celebrating because Randi is gone. He then says that he was never attracted to her which wasn’t the case when he first saw her. Shawn starts rating the women giving Randi a 6, Angie a 9½, and Erika an 8. Erika storms in wondering why Shawn gave her an 8. She should be flattered, though because she is more like a 5.

The next day, Shawn and Tiy-E are lying together in bed. Tiy-E starts complaining about aches he has, so either he’s sick or Shawn and him had a rough night of sex. You make the call.

They go into Erika’s hut where Shawn starts putting on her jewelry. It looks good on him, which makes me think he’s done this before.

The radio comes on, and it’s time for the final safety competition. There are four sets of posts that contain four posts. The castaways will stand on a post for five minutes. After the five minutes, they will cross to next post using a plank with rope attached to it, but they only have 90 seconds to cross. If they don’t, they’re out.

The castaways all make it across to the first post, although Erika almost didn’t make it. The signal sounds for the castaways to move to the third post, but Tiy-E and Erika don’t make it and are out. It’s down to Crazy Charlie and Shawn, and both of them are teetering. They attempt to go to the fourth post, but Crazy Charlie nosedives into the water, and Shawn is declared the winner. He then starts screaming that he’s the Diabetic Menace as he gets the life preserver.

They head back to the huts where Shawn stands proudly with the life preserver in his hand. He then launches into a very bad version of the theme song as I change the channel. They all start wondering about the vote that night.

Which brings us to Voodoo Village. The votes are:

Shawn votes for Crazy Charlie.
Crazy Charlie votes for Tiy-E.
Tiy-E not shown
Erika not shown

The votes are counted, and it’s a tie between Tiy-E and Crazy Charlie. We don’t get a purple rock, however. Instead, the previous Voodoo Villages will decide the vote. The person who had the most votes cast against them previously will be gone from Gilligan’s Island, and that person is Tiy-E. He says his farewells and leaves. Shawn is now heartbroken that his lover is gone.

The castaways head back to the huts, and they reminisce about all the good times they’ve had. We had an electric toothbrush, Coconut Howie, naked cabana boy, and many other things.

And now, it’s the grand finale. Time to see who gets rescued and wins $250,000. HostGuy comes to them and explains it. First, the castaways search the huts for a shovel. When they find it, they will then head to Voodoo Village and dig up a box containing stuff to make fire. Next, they head to the beach and make a fire in their pit. Finally, they must light a torch and go out to a platform in the ocean. The first person to do all that and signal the helicopter flying overhead.

The castaways start. They all go looking for the shovel, but they seem to have a lot of trouble finding it. None of them think to look at the top of the doorway for it, so they wander around from hut to hut. Finally, Shawn finds his shovel and heads to Voodoo Village.

Shawn gets there and starts digging his box up. Meanwhile at the huts, Charlie and Erika find their shovels and head out. All of them are digging their box out, but Charlie gets his first. He heads out to the beach while Shawn and Erika continue to dig.

Charlie starts getting his fire started. Meanwhile, Shawn gets his box out and races to the beach while Erika digs some more. Charlie and Shawn race to get the fire started while Erika still digs. Am I repeating myself? Charlie finally gets his fire going and lights his torch. He gets to the platform and waves his arms with flares in his hands and gets picked up by the helicopter. Shawn and Erika look on in disbelief as they realize they’re gonna be stuck on an island with each other. Crazy Charlie flies off into the sunset yelling, “Watch out!” because he got it on like a chicken bone. Finally, this travesty is over.

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