The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Episode 8 Summary

'Sausage, Stairs and Armor: A Tale of Vomit and Valor' By Cyndimaus

Previously on The Amazing Race... our teams flew to Poland but not all together. Some teams began a new leg before other teams had finished the current leg. It was a non-elimination leg so the Guidos are still racing, although they are marked for elimination. See ARnutz' wonderful summary for all the details.

We begin at 4:50 a.m. with Mirna and Charla leaving the pitstop. They are the fourth team to leave, a mere one hour and 18 minutes after the Guidos hit the mat. Those who have already left are, in order, Dustin and Kandice, the Cha Chas and Uchenna and Joyce. Mirna and Charla are two hours and 24 minutes behind Uchenna and Joyce.

As a reminder, teams will be taking one of two charter buses to Auschwitz/Birkenau. The first three teams are on the first bus, which leaves at 1 p.m., with Mirna and Charla the first team on the second bus, which leaves at 5 p.m. They have a nice wait ahead of them. Hm. Guess that big gap between the teams will be significantly closed. (nice for the teams who are waaaaay behind but a bummer for those with a nice lead)

Eric and Danielle leave the pitstop in 5th place at 1:50 p.m. Eric tells us that Danielle isn’t very focused but he is intense. They arrive to find they are on the final bus and have several hours to kill. Danielle wants to go buy coffee but Eric says they shouldn’t waste their money. He tells us that he doesn’t treat her as his girlfriend but his partner.

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They sit in a hotel lobby arguing about the coffee and how to spend their money. He says she’s never been this far in the race before and two dollars can make a difference. She exclaims that she’ll beg for $2 on the street. He doesn’t like this idea and tells her to just be quiet. She wishes she wasn’t being ignored every single day. She goes on and on about the coffee. At this point they go into a very childish give and take with Danielle saying “grow up” and Eric saying “shut up” back and forth to each other. (It reminded me of the two kids on The Emperor’s New Groove) Danielle ends up swearing at Eric and walking away.

Meanwhile the Guidos leave the pitstop at 3:32 p.m. and arrive at the charter bus location. They tell us that they are going to use brain power to do well in the race. They look around for the ticket dispenser and walk past it three times before finally spotting it. (I am SO impressed with that brain power, guys! Keep up the good work!)

The first bus arrives at Auschwitz/Birkenau. Teams exit the bus slowly and somberly, greatly affected by where they are and what happened there in the past. No one runs or talks loudly. (I really appreciate their respect) Teams find a candle and a brief history. They become very emotional as they read and each are deeply affected in their own way. They light a candle on the railroad tracks and then leave in taxis to go find their next clue. (for more information on Auschwitz/Birkenau you can visit here or here or here .)

Teams must now travel over 40 miles to Krakow and find Juliusz Slowacki Theater for their next clue. The Cha Chas arrive first to and discover an Intersection. Two teams must work together until further notice. Joyce and Uchenna arrive next and the two teams agree to work together.

The clue also contains a Fast Forward, which the teams immediately agree to go for. They must travel ¼ mile to Market Street and climb the stairs of two towers (Sauron is nowhere to be found), the Fire Guard tower of St. Mary’s church and the Town Hall tower. They must count the steps in both towers and add them together to get the correct number. They will then receive the Fast Forward.

Dustin and Kandice are left to wait for another team to arrive, which they know will not be for another four hours.

“This totally stinks!” they lament. Cue shot of the other teams on the second charter bus.

“Oh dang it!” they exclaim again, bemoaning the long wait they will have before they can continue racing.

Uchenna, Joyce and the Cha Chas climb the stairs in the Town Hall and all arrive at 111 for the stair count. They proceed to the Fire Guard Tower and climb those stairs. They get three different numbers. But they go with the two numbers that agree, add it to the other number and end up with the correct amount. They happily receive the Fast Forward.

They are instructed to skip all tasks and go directly to the pit stop, which is at Pieskowa Skala castle. They are to take the marked cars that are provided. The Cha Chas follow a cab. Uchenna and Joyce follow them. They walk side-by-side to the mat and step on together.

Phil informs them are teams number one but there is only one prize. They must choose which team will receive it. The Cha Chas immediately give the prize to Uchenna and Joyce. It is a lovely trip provided by Travelocity. Danny and Oswald inform them and Phil that they won’t be giving up the million dollars, though.

Meanwhile the second charter bus has arrived at Auschwitz/Birkenau. Again, there is much emotion, each team affected.

“Nothing can describe the silence and emotion you feel when you step out there,” the Guidos state.

Eric says this puts things in perspective and that their fights over nothing don’t even matter compared to this.

Charla and Mirna feel a personal connection since their ancestors experienced their own horrible holocaust when they (Armenians) were murdered by the Turks, including their great-grandfather’s family.

Everyone is grateful for their freedom.

As they leave it is very foggy (appropriate for the mood).

Meanwhile, at the clue box Dustin and Kandice are guessing on who will arrive first and are hoping it will be the Guidos. They hide as Charla and Mirna arrive first and search for the clue box. Eventually they decide to pop out and help them, wanting to “get this show on the road”. (this is Team Girl Power)

The four girls read their clue and find that it is a Detour. (which, as Phil informs us, is a choice between two tasks)

Choice one: Eat It Up. Teams must travel to the old market. Each team member must make a 3 inch kielbasa sausage. Then they will be served an eight foot link of sausage. Each member must eat a two-foot portion. When they have all finished they will receive their next clue.

Choice two: Roll It Out. Teams must travel to the old Jewish quarter and find a bakery. They must roll out 20 bagels the right way. They must go by foot to deliver a basket of bagels. They will then receive their clue. Alas, we will never see this choice.

The girls discuss which task to do. Dustin and Kandice have had time to think about it and they want to do “Eat It Up”. Charla asks if you can just throw it up. Mirna says she’s not a big eater. They choose “Eat It Up” anyway.

Eric, Danielle and the Guidos pair up. (this is Team Dysfunctional)

Interestingly, they talk as if they have a choice about it. They discuss the detour and whether Danielle will be able to do it. If she can’t it will hurt them. They choose “Roll It Out”. They make it to the Jewish quarter but their cab drivers don’t know where the bakery is. They aren’t from this area. No one on the street knows where the bakery is either. They decide to go ahead and switch tasks.

Meanwhile the girls have arrived and watch a demonstration of how to make a sausage. Charla says she doesn’t like sausage. (Uh oh, this could mean trouble) Then they start working on their own sausages. They joke about female bonding over sausages. (I shall not comment)

As the girls move to the table to eat they decide to pray over their meal and then begin eating. Charla and Mirna begin their complaining. Dustin and Kandice tell them to count their blessings. The other teams aren’t there yet and that would add pressure. This, of course, cues the arrival of the other teams. Mirna shouts to them that the sausage tastes like poop. Danielle looks even more nervous about doing the task.

Team Dysfunctional moves to make their sausages while Team Girl Power continues eating.

Charla and Mirna are struggling to eat. Dustin and Kandice ask why they’re eating to slowly. Charla says, “maybe something is wrong with me.” Mirna burps loudly while Dustin and Kandice exchange looks of disgust.

Team Dysfunctional finishes making their sausage and moves to the tables to begin eating. Danielle says it tastes good.

Meanwhile, Charla still has a lot to eat. She and Mirna have lots of back-and forth, which amuses Dustin and Kandice.

The Guidos started out concerned about Danielle’s ability to complete the task but are now more worried about Eric. They really want to keep things moving because of their 30 minute penalty.

We are treated to multiple shots of everyone eating. Then Joe finishes his sausage, snaps his fingers and calls, “waiter!” as if he’s in a nice restaurant.

More shots of everyone eating.

Kandice finishes her sausage and tells Charla to concentrate. Mirna says that Charla is distracted and can’t eat when she’s distracted. (as Charla looks over her shoulder at Team Dysfunctional)

More shots of everyone eating.

Dustin finishes eating then leans over and promptly throws up.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, Miss California!” proclaims Bill as everyone laughs. Dustin says thank you as she wipes her mouth.

More shots of everyone eating.

Mirna finishes her sausage. She then tells Charla to just put her head back and push the sausage in. It doesn’t seem to work too well.

Charla then says she wants to throw up. She picks up a knife, stands up and walks over to the provided bucket. Dustin and Kandice cringe.

Charla makes several unsuccessful attempts to throw up but manages some nice retching noises. Dustin and Kandice are laughing with their backs turned to her. Charla finally succeeds in her quest to throw up and makes it sound quite nasty. Danielle, who is sitting right behind her, covers her ears, as does Bill.

Bill finishes his sausage.

Dustin and Kandice encourage Charla.

Danielle proclaims, “I don’t want to be here right now.”

Eric and Danielle are both close to finishing while Charla is still struggling to eat. She keeps hovering between the table and the bucket, unsure of what to do. (does someone empty the bucket in between trips?)

Charla and Danielle both have only a small amount left to eat. Danielle finishes.

Charla puts the last bite in her mouth but just can’t get it down. Eric finishes and Team Dysfunctional gets their clue.

They are to drive in marked cars to Pieskowa Skala Castle to get their next clue. The teams are no longer joined. They rush outside.

Charla finishes her sausage and the girls get their clue. They run out, right past the other two teams, who are in the process of getting into taxis. Are we supposed to drive ourselves, they wonder. (no, the clue only said to find a marked car and drive yourself. Why would you think that?)

Dustin and Kandice find the cars first and decide to follow a taxi.

Charla and Mirna are next to the cars. Mirna is complaining of feeling badly. “I’m going to vomit and I have to drive a car,” she complains as Charla climbs into the back seat.

To make things worse, Mirna can’t get the brake to release. As she struggles with it the Guidos drive past them and then ask a cab driver for help. Mirna is yelling at Charla to leave her alone.

Dustin and Kandice are glad they are following someone.

The Guidos say they need to buy a map.

Eric and Danielle are asking “how do we find this place?”

Charla and Mirna are trying to get a cab to follow. She is talking to two cabbies and neither one knows where to go. Mirna is yelling at them, “Only one taxi!” They think they’re lost.

The Guidos stop to buy a map.

Eric and Danielle ask someone where Skala is. They don’t know.

The cabs Charla and Mirna are following stop. They don’t know where they are going..

The Guidos walk out to their car with a map. They know where they are now.

Eric and Danielle find a cab to follow.

Mirna is talking money with the two cabbies out her car window. They want $100. Mirna says, “I don’t have $100!”

The Guidos talk about it being absolutely essential that they arrive 30 minutes before the other teams. (please ignore the foreshadowing) One thing they know is that Mirna can’t drive worth a damn.

Cut to Mirna complaining to the cabbies about not having 100 dollars. “I’m a young girl. I’m not made of money!”

“Bye Bye!” say the cabbies and walk away. Mirna is freaking out. She calls out tearfully, “just show me, my friend. I am begging you.”

Amazingly, one of the cabbies comes back and Mirna barters him down to $50. “God get me out of this country, “ she exclaims. (I’m sure the locals would agree with this request)

The Guidos are halfway there. “If it boils down to a car race I think we have a good chance,” they explain.

Eric and Danielle’s cabbie stops. They aren’t there yet. He shows them how to get there on their map. They pay him and he leaves.

The cab Mirna is following stops to check with her on directions. Mirna tries to get the clue from Charla, who is sitting calmly in the back seat. This upsets Mirna greatly. (sorry for the understatement).

“What are you doing?!!!?” Mirna yells back at her.

“I’m doing nothing, “ Charla calmly replies in a deadpan voice.

Mirna yells some more. “I don’t understand! Am I supposed to do everything?”

“No,” replies Charla in the same voice. “You’re supposed to yell at me.”

Not surprisingly, this does nothing to calm Mirna down. She continues to yell at Charla. Charla finally says, “could you yell a little more at me? Is it not enough?”

Dustin and Kandice arrive at the castle and retrieve the clue. It is a roadblock and Dustin decides to do it.

She must dress in a full suit of armor and lead a horse a half mile across the castle grounds to the castle and give the horse to a stable boy. Then they must search the grounds for the pit stop.

They complete the task rather easily and check in with Phil, Dustin still in her armor. They are team number three.

Charla and Mirna arrive next. They decide that Charla will do it. (Mirna thinks Charla will be riding the horse) Charla is nervous.

The Guidos are driving behind Eric and Danielle as they spot the castle in the distance.

Mirna is yelling at Charla as they walk through the woods, Charla leading the horse. (sort of)

Eric, Danielle and the Guidos get to the clue box at the same time. Eric and Bill will do the roadblock. As they change, Joe and Danielle laugh about Charla. Joe says Charla looks like a dressed up rat. Danielle laughs.

Charla, meanwhile, is struggling to lead the horse. It keeps wandering off the path. Mirna, of course, is nagging at her., telling her that he has to lead the horse. It doesn’t know what to do. It’s confused. “This is a nightmare,” she states. (yes, we know!)

Mirna is freaking out. She can see the Guidos. Then the horse bumps into Charla and she does a face plant on the path. (please laugh quietly….you know we shouldn’t be laughing. No really, we shouldn’t)

Despite Charla’s mishap and Mirna’s complaining, they check in fourth at the mat.

The Guidos check in next but have to step aside due to their thirty minute penalty. It doesn’t really matter because Eric and Danielle check in moments later as the official team number five.

The Guidos are eliminated from the race. We witness various warm fuzzy comments from both Joe and Bill Get ready, Sequesterville, here they come!

Next week: Charla and Mirna infuriate Eric and Danielle by using both available computers.

“You gonna let us use on of those computers?”

“No,” retorts Charla, “We just got on.”

Later,in a cab, Eric mocks them.

The Cha Chas reach their boiling point, arguing with each other.

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