Survivor: All Stars - Episode 12 Summary

'Pagong... I Think Not' By LadyT

I am happy to say that this episode was a lot better than the last one. On the previous Survivor it rained like it always does. I think that whenever they show us that it is raining or a Survivor complaining it is raining, we should take a shot. Since they start every show with rain, I would be so loaded right now I would probably make a pass at Tom’s son. Kathy felt betrayed by Rawb. She thought that because they were on Marquessas together she could count on him. Whatever. There was a combined Reward Challenge/Immunity Challenge that was an obstacle course. The team of Shii-Ann, Ambah, Alicia and Rawb won the reward, letters from home and the latest fashion piece, a green poncho. Out of the four of them, whomever solved a puzzle won a video from home and immunity. But all of them watched a little bit of video. And of course we had to go back to the very first Survivor and keep Jenna in suspense as to whether her family could figure out where the post office was so they could send it in time. Come on, just because she is from Franklin, NH doesn’t mean that all people from NH are dumb. Let me explain that a little more. See, Jenna went to my rival high school and it is in my High School genetics to hate her on principle. So I do.

Rawb decides to be the BMOC and gives up his video so everyone can have their letters. He did it out of the bottom of his ever strategizing heart.

Kathy and Shii-Ann were forced to scramble and tried to form an alliance. Rob interected a Joey Lawrence “Whoa, look at the scrambling” It failed and Kathy was sent home. Hey Kathy, have some Nectar’s fries on me, ok? Then we saw the best part of every show when they show the beginning and I get to see my one true love, Colby.

Day 29

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Guess what? It’s raining!!! (Shot)

Shii-Ann is emotional today because her rock has been voted out. Not the one that she sits on constantly, alienating herself from everyone else, but Kathy. She knows that she is about to be pagonged. She goes to Rawb and asks if she is next. That is like asking Tom if he wants some whiskey. Shii-Ann decides that she doesn’t want to be pagonged and will stir it up and win immunity. As lightning strikes behind her.

Tree mail reveals a big mask. On the trek to the Reward Challenge where it is raining again (Shot) How come Jeff never looks wet? His hair is in perfect place, it never moves. Anyway, all seven of them have masks with three ropes attached to them. All the Survivors are given questions and have to answer truthfully (whatever). Then Jiffy will ask the questions again and they have to answer how they think everyone else will answer. If you get the question right, you get to cut someone’s rope. Three strikes and you are out. The reward is a food reward. All of them will go to a Panamanian restaurant and there will be seven items on the menu. Winner decides who eats what. The food will range from steak to rice and water from the camp.

First question - Who will you trust with your life? Answer: Boston Rawb. I almost flew out of my chair. Are these people on crack? I would have loved to have seen what Lex’s gut would have said about that.

Second question - Who does not deserve to be an All Star? My answer, all of them left. Correct answer- Shii-Ann and Chyna (yes Shakes I coined it first) Chyna does all she can do to keep her finger under control.

Third question - Who uses sex as a weapon. Um, do you think that the answer just might be Ambah? Well you thought right.

Fourth question - Who is not smart, as in who is a dumbass? Answer: Chyna. Oh that finger wants to wave and I have no idea where she is getting that self control.

Fifth question - Who is the most honest? Answer: Rupert. Honestly I can’t make any jokes here

Sixth and final question - Who never shuts up? Answer: Jenna from Mudville. We from Brady still have your Liberty Bell.

Oh yeah, I bet you want to know who won. Rupert won. Tom was knocked out first. Chyna is pissed because now she knows that no one likes her. Rupert gets to decides who eats what on the menu. He and Jenna meet and they decide that Rupes will pick a person and they get to choose their meal. When they get to the restaurant, Rupes is escorted to the head of the table. He takes the steak for himself, accompanied by open bar. Rob chooses next and takes a burger and cola. Jenna is next and takes a hot dog and sauerkraut with orange juice. Good, glad you got that because that sounds like the worst meal ever. Rupes selects Amber to choose next and she takes a ham and cheese sandwich. Alicia follows and takes the salad. Tom gets cold potatoes leaving Shii-Ann with the rice. She complains the whole time and perpetuates the stereotype that because she is Asian she should eat rice. Get over it. You really should have been given cheese so that they could have also given you wine.

It’s now 9:30 as I am writing this and the switchboard at CBS is still lit from all the drinking that Rupert has done.He downs beer after beer. At the next ad, they show that ad where if your friend is drinking too much, they may need help. Is that a message for you Rupes, or perhaps Tom?

I do have to mention this though. Rupes revealed the new Tagi alliance when he let everyone pick their own food. Hatch couldn’t have done it better.

It is now Day 30 and sorry, no shot. It’s not raining. Tom and Chyna discuss how they have to stick together because each thinks that they can win against the other. Do you two honestly believe you will make it to the Final Two, even yet, the Final Four? Oh Gag Me With A Spoon! Chyna and Tom have snuggled. Excuse me while I go get sick.

Immunity Challenge. The Survivors have to stand on a log with one arm in a chain over their head. The chain is attached to a water bucket. If you move too much, the water drenches you and you are out. Amber, pulling a Dicque Hatch because she knows she is safe and gets wet after 4 minutes (insert your own Rawb joke here). Jenna, not to be outdone follows at 10. Wimps. I could have held out until at least 11. Big Tom shows us he has no strength and bites the big one at 16 minutes. Chyna waits a bit longer and is out at 38 minutes. Ok, now you all can have a shot because it starts to rain. Now I wonder, what would happen if it rained too much and filled the water buckets so much that they naturally fell? I guess we will never know. Anyway, at 1 hour and 24 minutes, Rawb starts to bite his arm. Apparently stupid was written there and he wanted to get it off. Down came the water and he was out.

So it’s down to the Chaboga Mogo’s worst nightmare. Shii-Ann is still in it and hasn’t shown any sign of fading while Rupes is struggling. I have to admit, I really started to admire Shii-Ann for a minute or two. As that wench from Franklin keeps telling Rupes to hold on, Shii-Ann makes no bones about the fact that she needs it and she will win it. And win it she did after 2 hours when Rupert couldn’t hold on anymore. Shii-Ann lets out a victory yell and Chyna sends Shii-Ann the evil eye. Foreshadowing anyone?

Shii-Ann is reveling in her glorious win and then apologizes for doing so. She wants Rawb out, but no one listens to her. She tries to get people to talk to her, but no one does. Should Rupert, Chyna or Rawb be sent to Loser Lodge? Then we get a clip of Days of Rawb’s and Ambah’s Lives. Do they completely trust each other? Are they just playing each other? Is Marlena really the serial killer? Do we really care?

At Tribal Council it is obvious that when Lex and Kathy come in they believe that Shii-Ann will soon be joining them at Loser Lodge. They flash smiles of surprise that she actually won Immunity. Shii-Ann tells Jiffy that she knew she was going, it was no secret but she blew it out of the water when she won. Jiffy wants to know if the 4 original Chapera will stay together. Chyna answers that she doesn’t know, that when it came down to these six that it was “Game On” Frantically I looked around, where the hell was Toni from Paradise Hotel? I thought she copyrighted “Game On”

Hey Chyna, American Gladiators called. By a vote of 6-1, they want you back.

Next week:

Jenna annoys everyone. Much like she annoys everyone else she has ever run into...

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